Monday, May 25, 2009

For What It's Worth



So I just finished watching my DVR'd episode of the Jon & Kate Plus 8 Season Premiere...and I am SO SAD. Yes, I've read all the tabloid gossip about them (and am a little bit ashamed for it) and had seen the previews for this season, so I'm not surprised to know they've been having problems. You always wonder what's true and what isn't, but to actually watch them during the confession time of the premier saying that they weren't sure their marriage would make it actually made my stomach hurt. To see a REAL marriage dissolving on television is heartbreaking, especially when there are 8 precious children involved. 

I know this begs the question...why am I so wrapped up in this "reality" TV show?

For starters, I've watched this show from the very first episode. Their sextuplets are only a year older than my oldest, Cody, so it has been fascinating to watch them grow and develop. It was fun for me to see how Kate handled all 8 of her kids, knowing that I would soon be experiencing some of the same things, albeit on a singular level. Whenever I got overwhelmed with something, like changing diapers, I would literally say to myself, "Well if Kate can do it with eight, then I can sure do it with one (and after I had Tyler, two)!".

The other thing about Jon & Kate that has resonated with me from the very beginning is their faith. They chose not to "reduce" when they were first told of their being pregnant with septuplets (if you didn't know, the 7th did not fully mature, so they ended up with sextuplets naturally). Do I know them personally? No. I can't be sure that either one of them is saved, but I'm pretty sure they profess to be Christians. They actively talked about God on their show, were shown taking their kids to church, and even wore clothing printed with scripture verses. For me, to see this Christian marriage headed for divorce is even more devastating.

The thing that struck me as the most odd, is both of them saying, "I'm here for my kids" over and over again. Yes, we get it. Clearly, their children are their first priority. But should they be? I understand that they are trying to protect their kids from the media, and from the painfulness of this situation. But shouldn't EACH OTHER be their first priority? It's pretty clear that one or both of them has checked out on the marriage, and that is what's sad to me.

I've always thought (and this is just my opinion here, so take it or leave it) that any time you put your child(ren)'s needs before the needs of your spouse you are walking in dangerous territory. I'm not saying it doesn't happen. Are there times when your child(ren)'s needs will come before your spouse's? Of course, just ask any mother of a newborn :). However, when this becomes the norm, be careful! 

That's just my two cents for the evening...for what it's worth. I'm hoping/praying that Jon & Kate can salvage their marriage!


4 comments:

  1. Beth, I am so with you. I am actually SORRY I watched this last night as it made me sick. Should their kids be first? And IF their kids WERE first, wouldn't they stay together? I don't think it is reality TV that is the "thing" with this one. For me it is a professing Christian couple who have a chance to meet so many people not making it ... it really hurt.

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  2. I wholeheartedly agree with your comments about marriage coming first. I like how you ended this post too...praying for their marriage.

    Isn't it interesting how invested we get in the lives of people on TV? I know I am a little too drawn in by LOST and well, I won't even tell you how mad I got about (I think his name was Richard) winning the first Survivor. :D

    ~ Wendy

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  3. The episode really effected me too. I think I expected them to "keep up appearances," talking about how they're working on it, how the media has blown it out of proportion. So when they basically said, Yeah...it's bad, I was surprised. Even if that's silly. I doubt that the whole truth is being told, people are so scared of telling the truth. But in the end, I felt for Kate. Yes, she's bossy and demanding...yes, she maybe has been gone a whole lot, but she's sitting there saying it was a "swift change." It sounds like Jon stuffed a whole lot of things for far too long. I've seen that happen over and over, people just going numb and giving up because they've been hurting for so long. It's just terribly sad. I don't know if I can keep watching, it just feels like I'm a peeping Tom on something that should be private. Anyway, apparently I had LOTS to say.

    :)

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  4. Great comments ladies...and nice to know I'm not alone!

    Wendy - it appears we have yet another thing in common, as I am ALMOST as addicted to LOST as I am J&K + 8 - I'm still going through withdrawal! :)

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