Beth Mann

Work It, Girl

2011-05-02T14:00:00.000-04:00

I know, I know, I did it again. I left you all for a week with no warning. HOWEVER, I had good reason, I swear!

MOMMY GOT A J-O-B! That's right, I am going back to work...FULL TIME. Last week was spent scrambling around trying to find interview clothes (thanks, Jodi), remembering how to put makeup on so it didn't look like my four-year-old did it (thanks, YouTube), re-learning how to walk in heels so I didn't break my freshly makeup-ed face (thanks, Carrie Bradshaw), and reviewing my dictionary for words other than "stop", "don't", "put that down", and "here, let me wipe that" (thanks, Merriam-Webster).

It was a success, and as of May 9th I am employed. I definitely have mixed emotions going into it - like how am I going to adjust from being home full time to being in an office full time (and away from my kiddos)? And also, how am I going to fit in any kind of writing with working full time and being mommy? I don't know the answers, but I know it's all going to be okay.

So. What does this mean for the good ol' blog, and for you, my wonderful friends? It means I need to go away for a bit. I wish I could say that I could pull this transition off and maintain the blog at the same time, but the truth is, I am not ~~insane~~ THAT organized! I wish I had a stockpile of posts just waiting for me to hit "publish", but I don't. I'm a pantser, a day-to-day kind of girl. So that's exactly what I'm going to do: take this day by day. I might pop in to post from time to time, but for now, I'm going to focus my energies and brainpower on settling into the new job.

You know I'll miss you. And in case you don't know...I'LL MISS YOU.

10 Breakout Prompts from Agent/Author Donald Maass

2011-04-20T11:02:00.001-04:00

Plenty of people talk about Twitter, Facebook, and other social media sites and how important it is for you to get yourself out there. Build your platform! Build a following! But what is forgotten is how these social media sites are also HUGE TOOLS for a writer's toolbox.

Here's just one more reason why if you're not on Twitter, you SHOULD be: Donald Maass. He is a literary agent and author whose books, Writing the Breakout Novel (and companion Workbook) and The Fire in Fiction, have made a huge impact on my own writing (and no, he hasn't paid me to say this). And I know plenty of other writers who would say the exact same thing (and I'm pretty sure he hasn't paid them either. But if you have, Don, you can mail my check to...).

If you are on Twitter*, you can follow him at @DonMaass. If you are not, I have pulled ten of his breakout writing prompts from Twitter and placed them here. Twitter is FREE, dear writers. And it isn't scary, I promise! It is full of hugely helpful FREE information that you might be missing out on! So without further ado...Mr. Donald Maass.

Which prompt did you find most helpful? And special thanks to Donald Maass, for just being his awesome self.

*You can also follow ME on Twitter @bethmann15

But I Love You

2011-04-18T11:20:00.000-04:00

My youngest gets out of his bed AT LEAST 4-5 times at bedtime. And it doesn't matter how much I do to prevent it before he actually goes to bed. I'll put a snack and drink by his bed. I open the window to let him know that the noises he hears are just cars going up the street. I make him use the potty...twice. It doesn't matter. This is how it goes.

"Mommy, I'm hungry."
"Mommy, I'm thirsty."
"Mommy, I need to go potty."
"Mommy, I heard a noise."

After the first four, he has me so amped up that I'm ready to throw something ~~(and it's usually aimed at my poor husband's head, because I can't take it out on the kid or the dog, now can I?).~~ I march him back into his bed and tell him FOR THE LAST TIME that if he gets out again there will be serious consequences ~~for his father~~.

Then, as I settle back onto the couch and put my freshly poured Coke to my lips, he's at it again. I huff and I puff like I'm going to blow the house down, but before I stand up my little guy says...

"Mommy, I just wanted to say I love you."

I love you too, you little emotional manipulator.

Does your kid drive you toward the brink of insanity only to melt your heart a moment later? Feel free to share :)

Some More of Something Borrowed

2011-04-15T13:34:00.001-04:00

Okay, so I know I've already said this, but I am SO STINKING EXCITED for Something Borrowed the movie to come out (in theaters May 6 by the way). It is by far one of my favorite books (written by the lovely Emily Giffin).

Here's just another little sneak peak of the movie with cast interviews (and your daily John Krasinski fix - in case you didn't get enough of him on The Office last night. Lord knows I didn't!).

I apologize for the spillover of the screen into my sidebar, but I am not a technological genius like my husband (who is not around at the moment TO HELP ME).

Happy Weekend!

Book Order and Birth Order

2011-04-13T11:48:00.000-04:00

To me, the order in which you write your books is a lot like the birth order of your children. When I had my first son, I obsessed over every tiny detail, from the moment I got pregnant until...well, I still kind of obsess about the details. Because he's my first. My trial run. The one where I learn what NOT to do, so I can make fewer mistakes with the second (and truth be told, you STILL make mistakes with the second, am I right?).

The same goes with writing your first book. When I first got pregnant, I read a ton of books on being pregnant and parenting, like What to Expect When You're Expecting, My Pregnancy Week by Week, and Babywise. (Parent note: DO NOT SKIP AHEAD IN THESE BOOKS, because you will completely freak yourself out and you will think that everything that could possibly go wrong in your pregnancy IS going wrong at that very moment. Trust me, I've done the research!)

Likewise, when I first got the idea to write a novel I started reading up on the craft of writing. I started with The Complete Idiot's Guide to Writing a Novel, because at the time, that's exactly what I felt like: a complete IDIOT. I also read On Writing, Plot & Structure, and Writing the Breakout Novel. Much like reading ahead in the parenting books, I completely freaked myself out writing my first draft, because I was so terrified that I was doing it wrong that it completely killed my confidence. (I recommend reading one book on craft, THEN writing the first draft the way you want to write it, THEN reading the rest of the books to perfect it in the editing stage.)

Did I get everything right with my first child? Only time will tell (and I'm sure his therapist will one day give me a definitive "no" on that one!). Did I get everything right with my first book? I can say with certainty NO. But I've learned...hoo boy, have I learned. And the second go 'round has been much more painless than the first.

What do you think? Does the first child/first book - second child/second book theory hold true for you? If you're not a parent, do you feel like your second book has come easier than the first?

The Old Bird Is At It Again

2011-04-12T11:11:00.000-04:00

I'm posting Mommy Monday on a Tuesday again. Sorry to my readers who like predictability! There is, however, good reason for my waiting until today. It's my youngest son's fourth birthday. Yep, my baby is four. I know you're thinking, didn't they already celebrate a birthday? And yes, you're right, my oldest just turned six on Saturday. And here it is, Tuesday, and we're celebrating another (what can I say, July is a fun month in our house)!

This day is always bittersweet for me, because my little guy came into the world with some difficulty and spent a week in the NICU before we were allowed to bring him home. In the grand scheme of things, a week wasn't really all that bad compared to most of the kids who had been in the NICU for weeks, some months. But that week? It was the LONGEST, most terrifying week of my life. It also happens to be the one time in my life that I have actually felt the presence of God holding me together. I will never forget that feeling as long as I live.

And now, that tiny, five pound baby is thirty-five pounds, and so awesome that sometimes he takes my breath away.

Happy Birthday, wonderful Tyler. We love you so much!

Further Proof That I Am An Old, OLD Woman

2011-04-08T12:03:00.000-04:00

Last Saturday, I went to a baseball game to support my husband (who is a coach) and to enjoy some of the beautiful weather we were having here in Georgia. Our team won (yea!), and then I threw my back out (boooo!). That's right. BACK. OUT.

The annoying thing here, is that I wasn't doing cartwheels or russians or anything even remotely cheerleader-y to celebrate our team's win. I hadn't so much as high-fived anyone. All I did was bend over to PICK UP MY KEYS from the bleachers where I had been sitting, and I suddenly felt like I had been stabbed in my lower back. I couldn't walk, couldn't crawl, couldn't BREATHE the pain was so bad.

So here I am, almost a week later, and I am still hobbling around like an old woman, wondering when the pain will get better. And if what I've been through the past week - trying to figure out who to see and what medication to take and just exactly what I did - is any indication of what being and old lady will be like THEN JUST KILL ME NOW.

Also, my oldest son is turning SIX this weekend. Which is a third of the way to eighteen. Which means if I blink again he will be driving and going away to college and getting married and LEAVING ME FOREVER. So yeah, time to start thinking about having another baby, honey! Think they'll give me the epidural, like, NOW?

Happy 6th Birthday, sweet Cody. ~~Your very old~~ Mommy loves you so much!

Happy Weekend, everyone! :)

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

2011-04-06T09:00:00.002-04:00

I have never taken a picture that so accurately represents my life as a mom/writer. You will notice:

1) There is a laptop charger,

2) the laptop charger is covered in a mysterious brown substance that could be either a) poop from my three-year-old, since he still doesn't know how to wipe his own behind and likes to touch things that look like they might be a toy, b) dog poop, since she gets mad at me for ignoring her in favor of playing with my imaginary characters, one of whom has a cat, and my dog hates cats, or c) a chocolate bar - melted because I stuffed said chocolate bar into my computer bag so I would not have to share it with aformentioned three-year-old (selfish? yes. necessary to my sanity? absolutely.) and then accidentally put my hot laptop charger in the bag on top of said chocolate bar.

What do you think? Poop or chocolate? What would your picture look like?

* For the record, it's chocolate, and I will neither confirm nor deny eating it right off the charger.

How to Annoy Me/Charm Me

2011-04-04T10:00:00.003-04:00

I am borrowing this idea from one of my favorite bloggers, Heather Armstrong over at Dooce.com. She used to do these posts called "How to Annoy Me" and "How to Charm Me" and I thought I'd do something along those lines. It's a variation on my Love It/Hate It posts. My "How to Annoy Me" moments remind me a little of Mr. Heckles' Book of Grievances from the show Friends. (Which, I should mention, I miss so very, very much. However, shows like Modern Family and The Office take the edge off a bit, no?) On that note:

How to Annoy Me:
- Allow Steve Carrell to leave The Office.

How to Charm Me:
- Replace Steve Carrell with Will Ferrell!

How to Annoy Me:
- Let me pre-pay $20.00 for gas and then stop the pump at $19.37 and make me wait for five minutes while it slowly creeps its way to $20.00.

How to Charm Me:
- Serve that yummy, crunchy, awesome hospital ice at your gas station - and offer Coke, not Pepsi.

How to Annoy Me:
- Pull out in front of me in traffic with, like, 9 LADDERS dangling from the roof of your truck (or a bed full of used furniture tied down with a SINGLE ROPE).

How to Charm Me:
- Wave and smile (and not give me the finger) when I pass by you with an "Are you SERIOUS?" look on my face.

How to Annoy Me:
- Ask me if I'm tired, don't wait for me to answer, and then tell me I LOOK tired.

How to Charm Me:
- Say, "Has anyone ever told you that you look a little bit like..." and then name an insanely gorgeous celebrity. Even if you only said I look "a little" like that person, I'll take that compliment to the bank.

How to Annoy Me:
- Gift me with an entire loaf of fresh-baked bread. (Don't you know I have a carbohydrate addiction?)

How to Charm Me:
- Gift me with an entire loaf of fresh-baked bread. (See how quickly I forgive?)

How to Annoy Me (as previously seen on Facebook):
- Allow me to pre-sort my groceries into their rightful categories (i.e. frozen foods, dairy, fruits & veggies, meats, boxed & canned items) and then not pay any freaking attention to my efforts when you bag them. I realize that you make very little, grocery bagger, but if I pull one more frozen pizza from a bag full of cereal boxes, I WILL come for you*.

How to Charm Me (also seen on Facebook):
- Be my husband and bring me Butterfinger bites and Discs 1 & 2 from Mad Men Season 4 (Yep, he's a keeper).

That's it for now. Now you tell me: What annoys/charms you?

* I will also come for you if you forget to put my $9 mascara in the bag, because it will cost me that much in gas to come back to your store!

** Also annoying? Throwing your back out - which is what I did on Saturday (the very same day I wrote this post, and no, the irony is not lost on me).

When A Day Turns Into A Year

2011-03-22T10:23:00.000-04:00

Sooo...yeah. I've been gone for more than a week. I didn't mean to ignore you all. Some stuff has come up over the last week and a half that has completely thrown me for a loop, and I have had no capacity for creative thought AT ALL.

Not to get all Terminator on you, but I'll be back. I'm hoping by next Monday, but I'm not even sure about that at the moment. Mommy's taking her Blogger hat off for a bit, to enjoy my family, to help my friends, and to recoup a little bit.

In the meantime, y'all stay out of trouble. And by all means, IF ANYONE GETS PREGNANT/MARRIED/GETS A BOOK DEAL YOU BETTER TWEET ABOUT IT!

Love,

Beth

If A Tree Falls In The Forest

2011-03-11T10:19:00.000-05:00

This morning started off in an ordinary way -- making breakfast, watching cartoons, getting kids dressed for school...the regular mom routine. It wasn't until I dropped my oldest off at school at 9:30 that I turned on the radio and heard about the devastation in Japan caused by an earthquake, and subsequent tsunami. I was completely shocked. I'm still in shock.

We go about our lives sometimes, completely unaware that there is a world full of other people out there, and that a great number of them are suffering. I remember feeling a similar way when 9/11 happened. I was in London, England, and had just spent a beautiful morning walking through the Museum of London, completely unaware of the tragedy that was unfolding back home.

Except this time it's not my homeland, it's someone else's.

My prayers are with the Japanese people, and anyone else affected by these natural disasters.

This Is Why I Write

2011-03-09T11:37:00.001-05:00

I read author Kiersten White's post yesterday about the publishing industry and how there are no shortcuts to getting to the top (and by top, I mean published). Now, I likened this post to a high school senior taking a new freshman under his/her wing and offering them a how-not-to-get-your-a**-kicked talk (even though I'd probably have to be on my knees in order for Kiersten herself to put me under her wing, because I am nearly six feet tall, and she is, well...not).

As you will see by her post today, not everyone understood her intentions, so she goes in a little deeper and explains her meaning (and, recognizing that her subject matter is rather heavy, offers a bit of lightness via Flight of the Conchords at the end, which is hilarious). This is my favorite excerpt from today's post:

"If you are trying to get published because you love writing, never lose sight of the why. Don't get so focused on having a book that you lose the reasons you write those manuscripts in the first place. Writing is amazing. The best writers I know write because without writing they would be lost. They write because of the sheer giddy joy of creation. They write because they genuinely, unabashedly love telling stories. They stick it out through the frustrations of drafting and the agonies of edits because they are deeply committed to what they are doing. They move forward from rejection and failure because to quit writing is unfathomable, even if some days it feels like they would be far saner if they just gave up. They perfect their craft because it's important to them that what they are writing and expressing is written and expressed in the best possible way." ~ Kiersten White (NY Times bestselling author of Paranormalcy and Supernaturally, out this August)

This is why I write. Thanks, Kiersten, for taking us all under your little wing. ;)

Taking The Mommy Hat Off

2011-03-07T10:48:00.000-05:00

Being a mother is an incredible blessing, but it certainly doesn't come without challenges (many of which you can read on this very blog!). However, I have seen one too many news stories lately of mothers doing horrifying things to their children: abuse, abandonment, sometimes even death. It absolutely breaks my heart. Whether these acts are being carried out by frustration, desperation, mental illness, or a combination of the three, I can't help but think that they could've been avoided.

After I had my second son, I went through a bout with postpartum depression. At first, I didn't want to admit what I was feeling because I thought I would be judged. Christians don't suffer from depression, they've just lost their joy in Jesus! Someone put it to me this way: If you have a cold, you go to the doctor and get medicine to feel better. Well, your brain has a cold. So what are you going to do? That took some of the stigma out of it for me. I finally went to my doctor and he prescribed a low-dose anti-depressant that helped within days. I'm not saying drugs are for everyone, but I do want to take some of the shame out of admitting that we moms might need a little more help sometimes. I've since been able to wean myself off and feel better than ever.

There are seasons in our lives that are very busy, and more often than not, our needs will take the backseat to our children's/spouse's. But please, moms, take the time to care for yourself, too. It's okay to take the mommy hat off sometimes (but for goodness sake, remember to put it back on!). Schedule that doctor's appointment that you've been putting off; scrounge up some spare change and go have a manicure. Ask your spouse to give you some time away, and if he can't do it, find a babysitter who can. Can't afford a babysitter? Join or start a co-op with some friends, where you take turns watching each other's children. If all else fails, then by all means, put on a cartoon, lock yourself in the pantry, and eat that last cupcake that you were saving for your kid - trust me, you need it more than he does.

All that to say, we moms have a tough job. There is no shame in admitting it, out loud. Tell a friend, tell your doctor, tell God. Just don't hold it all inside.

Favorite Things

2011-03-04T10:54:00.000-05:00

It's Fun Friday, kids! So today I wanted to share one of my favorite things with you (like Oprah, except I'm too poor to actually give anything away, but if I could...YOU'D GET A CAR and YOU'D GET A CAR and YOU'D GET A CAR! Hee hee.). I mean, besides pancakes. And fountain drinks. And pretzel M&M's. Oh, and my children's laughter. Yes. That too. (Mom of the Year!)

This book, right here:

Something Borrowed, by the lovely Emily Giffin spurred me on to finishing my novel when I really didn't want to go any further. I had started it, and then fell into a rut. Then I read this book (and then ALL of her books), and it inspired me so much that I got back to writing again. And now... it's been made into a movie! Squee! I know I'm going to LOVE this movie (hello, John Krasinski from The Office! LOVE!). The only thing that stinks is that I have to wait until May to see it :( Here's the trailer:

Happy Weekend! What's one of your favorite things?

Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss

2011-03-02T10:53:00.000-05:00

It is only appropriate on this Writer Wednesday to pay homage to the one and only...Dr. Seuss.

Many of my favorite books as a kid were Dr. Seuss ones, and I find that even as an adult, his books still have meaning. For instance, Oh, The Places You'll Go! speaks to my life as a writer in an almost prophetic way, particularly the "waiting room" portion. That is exactly what I feel like in my writing journey -- waiting for the phone to ring, for a yes or a no -- how does he know so much about me?!

Take a moment and listen to this reading of Oh, The Places You'll Go! (read by the talented John Lithgow) and tell me which part you identify with most as a writer. Are you one of the high flyers? Or are you in a slump? Or, like me, are you in the waiting place?

Spinning Is For Spinsters

2011-02-28T10:30:00.000-05:00

Okay, that's not true. I'm just bitter because I fell of the wagon. Actually, I ate the wagon. Because it was filled with pancakes.

As I mentioned last week, my mom came for a week-long visit, wherein I ate pancakes LIKE IT WAS MY JOB. (OMG, can you imagine if your job really was eating pancakes for a living? Or Krispy Kremes? I know, I have issues. Moving on.) It is always bittersweet having her visit, because I LOVE having her here with me, but I HATE IT when she has to leave again. Especially when she is returning to South Florida and sunshine, leaving me here in Georgia with cloudy skies and rain...grrr.

Last week also officially began baseball season for my husband, who coaches Varsity baseball at the school where he teaches. Baseball Season = Single Mommy for a while. It's not my favorite time of year, but at least the sun is usually out and we can go to the games. Plus, I have a wonderful friend (HI JODI!!!) who is also a baseball widow (her husband is the head coach) and we have sleepovers with our kids to make it through those long weekends when the husbands are not around. KUDOS TO YOU SINGLE PARENTS OUT THERE WHO DO IT ALL YEAR LONG!!!

Remind me again why I decided to try and cut out carbs and do more exercise during baseball season? Because all I really want to do after a long day of being with children and cleaning up after children is sit on my fat butt and eat comfort foods like carbohydrates whilst drinking high fructose corn syrup flavored, caffeinated, carbonated beverages. IS THAT SO WRONG?

I'm In A Food Coma

2011-02-23T13:37:00.000-05:00

Internet, the next time I decide to start eating right and exercising, remind me NOT TO INVITE MY MOTHER TO VISIT. I apologize for the unannounced break I've been taking, but I will return on Monday with plenty of things to entice you, I promise. Have I mentioned it's baseball season? Well, it is. Uneventful to the general public, but for this wife? Of a Varsity coach? THE INSANITY, I TELL YOU.

If you need me in the meantime, I'll be stuffing my face with pancakes. And bacon. And maybe even a biscuit. I KNOW - THAT'S DOUBLE CARBS! Did I mention it's baseball season? And I'm a single mother now? And my mommy is here to baby me for a week? STOP JUDGING ME, INTERNET.

See you Monday!

For The Music Lover

2011-02-18T12:14:00.000-05:00

I was reminded yesterday that tickets for Bonnaroo go on sale tomorrow. If you're not familiar with Bonaroo, it is a 4-day music and arts festival held in Manchester, TN. I have always wanted to go to a huge music festival like this, where you basically camp out for four days and listen to some amazing music, but have yet to do so. It is on my bucket list, to be sure. That, and not showering for 4 days straight.

This year's lineup is especially wonderful, in my opinion, because Ray LaMontagne will be there. I had the chance to hear him live a few months ago when he opened for David Gray here in Atlanta, and it was spectacular. In addition to Ray, here are a few other artists that I LOVE LOVE LOVE that will be there, too. Click on the links to hear them for yourself.

The Decemberists - this band is like a mixture of some of my favorite 90's artists rolled into one: REM, Gin Blossoms, and Natalie Merchant.

Mumford and Sons - Love these guys. They're British, and we all know how I feel about British things, don't we? Plus, they use a banjo.

Iron and Wine - The vocals on some of these songs are absolutely heartbreaking, and I adore them (and yes, they are on the Twilight soundtrack, no judgement!).

Also, The Black Keys, Florence + the Machine, and Alison Krauss w/ Union Station.

That is only a small sampling of this HUGE event, but I just wanted to share some of my favorite music! Happy Weekend!

What's on your iPod/Pandora/radio?

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

A Love Letter To My Readers

2011-02-16T10:56:00.000-05:00

Dear Reader,

I'm feeling a bit of residual Valentine's Day mushiness, so where better to dump it than on you?

I LOVE YOU...

I really do.

Here are a few reasons why:

1) You've prayed for me, encouraged me, sent me warm and well wishes on days where I haven't felt quite up to speed.

2) You make me laugh (and several of you make me laugh on a daily basis).

3) You keep coming back here, even though sometimes I have NO IDEA why.

4) You make me feel a part of something BIG.

5) You make me better -- your comments challenge me, they make me think, they give me energy.

I love being a writer, and I KNOW I AM A WRITER BECAUSE OF YOU.

My Love Language

2011-02-14T11:10:00.001-05:00

My love language?

It's not so much this...

As it is THIS...

(and in case you're wondering, yes, I look exactly this flawless when I sleep.)

Which is why my Valentine's Day card to my husband said:

I don't need a dozen roses to show me that you love me...

I just need an extra hour of sleep!

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone. Hope you get what you need from the love(s) in your life.

Tell me, what's YOUR love language?

Holy Biblical Reference Malfunction

2011-02-11T11:36:00.000-05:00

I can't even tell you how many times I have watched this video, y'all. I spent the better part of an evening laughing about this with my husband (because, in reality, we are still middle schoolers at heart). The poor guy's face right after he says what he didn't mean to say is PRICELESS.

Watch. Laugh. Enjoy.

Happy Friday!

Pass It On

2011-02-09T15:27:00.000-05:00

Last night, my husband and I were watching a Frontline documentary on the Digital Age we are living in, and it made me really sad. I want my children to understand technology and the gift that it is (my hubby is a technology TEACHER for heaven's sake), but like any good thing, too much of it can end up being a bad thing. I want to encourage my children to sit down and create something. Why not a book?

I apologize for the poor quality of this photo, but I just had to share this with you all. This is a book that was given to my son by his school's librarian (complete with his own artwork. He *loves* books. Lord, there is nothing more satisfying as a mom/writer than to know that my son LOVES books!) She knows how much he loves to read and draw, so she gave him this Little Golden Book that is blank (I believe they also sell them in a kit at Wal-Mart), so that he could create his own story. I didn't know about these until he brought it home, but what a WONDERFUL idea.

If you love reading/writing, how are you encouraging your children/the next generation to love it?

Mommy's Time Out

2011-02-07T14:52:00.000-05:00

I have a confession, Internet: this morning was kinda rough. Let's just say that lack of sleep + that lovely thing that God blesses women with every month = PSYCHO WIFE/MOMMY. My poor husband and children -- it's a wonder they haven't voted me off the island yet (although I have a theory that without me they would have NO CLEAN UNDERWEAR to wear. Ever.).

I should be punished. No, really, I should. So, I'm putting myself in TIME OUT.

Only problem is...I might never come out!

Happy Monday! And in case you're wondering, yes, that is a REAL bottle of Pinot Grigio called Mommy's Time Out. They sell it at Publix!

*Photo courtesy of Google Images.

Free Starbucks Contest Winner!

2011-02-04T11:14:00.000-05:00

Who's ready to mainline some STARBUCKS???

First of all, thank you so much to all who participated in the contest! I love meeting new people and getting a peek at what people are writing! Unfortunately, no agents responded. It's like they have WORK to do or something :P

And now, the moment we've all been waiting for!

The WINNER of the $20 Starbucks gift card is...

DIANE J.!!!!

Congratulations, Diane. (Drop me an email beth@beth-mann.com and tell me where you'd like it sent, and I will put it in the mail right away!)

I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend, and thanks again for playing!

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

Attention Agents and Writers: FREE COFFEE!

2011-02-02T12:13:00.000-05:00

Well that got your attention, didn't it?

Since so many of you are up to your eyeballs in snow on this Writer Wednesday, I wanted to do something to help you all think warmer thoughts. So without further ado...

A FREE COFFEE GIVEAWAY!!!

What you have to do to win:

Writers - Tell me in what genre you are writing.

Agents - Tell me what sort of projects you are currently looking for. (If you are not currently taking submissions, simply say that.)

Here's the point system:

Live Like You're Dying

2011-01-31T11:58:00.000-05:00

If you have been following this blog these last couple of weeks, you will know that I recently started working out, more specifically, SPINNING.

Yeah, about that.

The whole idea behind exercise is to prolong our lives by making them healthier, right? We eat well, we exercise, we live longer...and so the story goes. Well, I've decided that it's all a big trick, see.

The only reason that eating well (a.k.a. eating food that has no taste because all of the fun has been taken out of it/off of it) works is because the food looks so pitiful on your plate that you DON'T WANT TO EAT IT. Wow, I've lost five pounds already.

And exercising (a.k.a. doing something excruciating and foreign to your body for an hour's time)? Yeah, the reason exercising feels so good is because you are pushed so hard that YOU THINK YOU MIGHT DIE, and then when you don't? HEY LIFE IS SO BEAUTIFUL! WEEEE! I THINK I'LL DO A CARTWHEE -- OH NO! I PULLED MY HAMSTRING!

Dear Healthy People,

Tell me it gets easier.

Please.

Love,

Beth

*Image courtesy of Google Images

Writer Resources

2011-01-26T14:14:00.000-05:00

Hey, Gang.

Just popping in here between picking up groceries, dog poo, and kids from school (I know, you're jealous) to bring you some great links for writers. If you're not on Twitter, you really should be, if for no other reason than to follow Jane Friedman (@JaneFridman) and Elizabeth S. Craig (@elizabethscraig), two great writers who are also amazing at compiling writer resources. On that note, these are two links that I came across this morning that I wanted to share via these wonderful ladies.

There Are No Rules - Master Recap of 2011 Writer's Digest Conference by Jane Friedman (I don't know about you, but I would've sold my children, if it were legal my right arm to be at the Writer's Digest Conference this year. With this helpful compilation, it kind of feels like I was. You know, without all the awkward bumping into agents in the bathroom and whatnot.

The Writer's Knowledge Base created by Elizabeth S. Craig (and her software engineer friend, Mike Fleming), a search engine that is geared specifically to writer inquiries. Take that, Google!

Hope these are helpful to you. Just another reason social media is becoming more and more valuable to writers (especially unpublished writers!).

Have you come across any helpful Tweets today? Feel free to share them in the comments.

*Image courtesy of Google Images

Mad Men...Crazy Women

2011-01-24T10:37:00.001-05:00

The hubby and I have been watching Mad Men on DVD over the last couple of weeks (it all started with Atlanta's spectacular snow debacle, which kept us inside for a week straight), and we are completely hooked. The writing for this show is spectacular, and I absolutely love seeing what life was like in the '60's.

Everything seemed so glamourous back then: the smoking and cocktails and wearing of gloves and pearls. I actually laughed out loud last night as the daughter of Don Draper (the main character played by the delicious perfectly adequate Jon Hamm), who couldn't be more than 8 years old, played bartender for her parents. I can't imagine asking my son to pour me a glass of wine (I wouldn't), but I do like the idea of my children CATERING TO ME for a change! And of course, women are treated like property instead of actual people (putting up with cheating husbands and practically raising their children alone), but I do like that it was more acceptable for a woman to have some meat on her bones. Hooray for curves!!!

What do you envy about days gone by? Is there a particular era you would've liked to have lived in?

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

There's Another Mean Girl, And Her Name Is Twitter

2011-01-21T10:19:00.000-05:00

If you follow me on Facebook or Twitter then you already know that I received a rather alarming suggestion a few days ago. If you don't, then I'll give you a recap. Apparently, Twitter thinks I need to lose weight:

See that first suggestion? When I saw it I almost dropped my doughnut apple. Twitter thinks I need to follow Weight Watchers?! When did you get so judgy, Twitter? Why can't you just "like" me and ask me if I want to be friends with people like Facebook does?

I don't do diets - never have, never will. Don't tell me NOT to eat a certain something, because I inevitably will...a lot of it. I'm a rule breaker, remember? But exercise? Exercise I can do. So I decided to take a spin class because I'm a masochist it seemed like the cool thing to do.

"What'd you do today, Beth?"
"Oh, me? I went to spin class. I spin now. Yep, I'm a spinner."

In all honesty, I did the spin class because I enjoy being yelled at directed when I'm working out, and since I can't justify spending the money on a personal trainer, I found the first class available and went in.

The first thing I noticed was that the class was being led by a woman who, I kid you not, looks like Halle Berry on steroids: she is gorgeous and TOTALLY ripped. Gorgeous + totally ripped = I'll have what she's having. Second, WHO IN THE WORLD designs these bike seats? Could they not just add a little more padding so that we're sitting on an actual seat rather than something that looks like the Batmobile? Think I'm kidding?

My hilarious friend, Angie, suggested that I buy some of those spandex pants with the padded butt that they make specifically for cyclists, and I agree that in theory that that would make my spin experience far less painful. However, it would also make my butt look even bigger! I mean, what would Twitter say?

Despite hobbling out of that first class with Gumby legs, I really enjoyed it and am planning to do it more. Maybe then Twitter will suggest I follow @herehaveatwinkie or @youshouldreallyeatsomething. (I made those up, they are not actual Twitter accounts!)

Happy Weekend, everyone.

*Bike Seat and Batmobile Photos Courtesy of Google Images

Plotting and Scheming

2011-01-19T11:59:00.000-05:00

It all sounds so devious, doesn't it?

So I'm working on Book #2 and since Book #1 was such a train wreck when I finished the first draft exercising the Pantser Method, I've decided this time around to try the Plotter Method (to find a great explanation for the pro's and con's of each, click here - thanks, Roni!) even though I feel like it goes against my creative grain. In order to grow as a writer we have to be willing to try things we might not normally be inclined to try, right?

Naturally, I remembered bits and pieces of information about plotting from my high school English classes (Hi, Mrs. Groves!), but I wanted to go a little bit deeper so I picked up a few of the plotting books that I had on my bookshelf. James Scott Bell's Plot and Structure is the one I keep returning to for mechanics and ideas, but the most awesome advice with regard to plotting that I've gotten (and how horrible is it that I can't remember where I read it or heard it!) has been to write the synopsis first. Some people might freak out at that idea, but to me it just made sense. It also saves you some of the headache at the end from having to summarize your entire book into a few paragraphs - you've already done it!

Another thing that I really enjoy doing is creating my characters first. Fortunately, the main character for Book #2 is a character that was introduced in Book #1. This time, obviously, I'm fleshing out that character more, and Jody Hedlund has a great Character Worksheet (it's FREE!) that I have begun using to do just that.

What are some of your favorite plotting tips? Feel free to add any resources that you've found helpful in plotting your story too!

Happy Writing!

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

I've Been Known To Do This

2011-01-18T13:25:00.000-05:00

Remember how last week we had a snow day that turned into a snow week? Yeah, that was fun, wasn't it? Turns out a week of children being off from school turns a mother's brain into complete puppy chow (and speaking of puppies, my dog survived last week, too. Just in case you were thinking of calling Animal Control on me...justifiably). So, imagine my surprise when I woke up this morning and realized that it is Tuesday, not Monday. The MLK holiday combined with the snow week completely threw me off.

So. Away we go.

One of my absolute favorite (and hugely popular) Mommybloggers is Heather B. Armstrong over at Dooce.com. You can always count on Heather to be incredibly transparent about her life as a wife and working mother. I respect and admire her most for her posts dealing with her struggle with postpartum depression. However, I ADORE her, because she makes me laugh...almost every day. I will warn you, her language is often colorful and her (liberal) politics are not exactly my own, so if you're sensitive to those elements, proceed with caution. But her post today, "I'd totally be a groupie," is one of my new favorites. It's a must-read for you parents out there.

That's right, Mommy Monday on Tuesday. I'm thinking of making it permanent. Any blogs you've found that you are loving right now? Feel free to share in the comments. I'm always looking for new reading material, you know, since I have SO MUCH time on my hands. ;)

A Little Bit of Perspective

2011-01-14T12:56:00.000-05:00

I was fully prepared to post a rant today about how crazy this last week has been having the kids home from school due to snow (and it has been, trust me). But with all that's been going on in other parts of our country and other parts of the world, I can't help but be grateful. My children are safe, unlike 9 year old Christina Green, who died due to senseless violence in Arizona. My house might be covered in snow, but it is not under water like many of the homes in flooded Australia. We have not once lost power, we have been able to go to the grocery store, and we've had some really good family bonding time. Yes, it's been crazy, but I am grateful.

Have a great weekend, everyone.

A Kind Word Spoken

2011-01-12T13:27:00.000-05:00

A Kind Word Spoken
by John Greenleaf Whittier (1807-1892)

A little word in kindness spoke,
A motion, or a tear,
Has often healed the heart that's broken
And made a friend sincere.

A word, a look, has crushed to earth
Full many a budding flower,
Which, had a smile but owned its birth,
Would bless life's darkest hour.

Then deem it not an idle thing
A pleasant word to speak;
The face you wear, the thought you bring,

A heart may heal or break.

It's tough sometimes to be a writer. Anyone who has gone through the long and arduous process of querying a manuscript will tell you - it's TOUGH sometimes. Anyone who has gone through a second and third (and even a forth) round of edits on their manuscript will tell you - it's TOUGH. Anyone who has tried their hand at freelancing only to face rejection will tell you - it's TOUGH. Even just keeping up with something like this, a blog, can be tough sometimes.

So when you receive the slightest bit of encouragement, it feels AMAZING. When you get just the tiniest bit of approval, someone to say, "Hey, I like your writing," or "Congratulations on..." whatever it is, IT FEELS GREAT.

I got that today, from a very sweet friend of mine from college (thanks, Shanna). Sometimes it only takes a few kind words to heal a soul that has been a little bit bruised by life's ups and downs.

So first, I want to say thank you, readers. Thank you for showing up at this crazy place week after week and reading, commenting, and encouraging me. Thank you for making me feel less alone on this journey of writing (and parenting!). I do hope that you are encouraged here, through laughter or otherwise.

Second, I hope you will take the time to thank the people who support you, and then go and find someone else to share the encouragement with. You never know whose life you might touch at just the moment they need it.

Carpe...Somethingorother

2011-01-10T15:59:00.000-05:00

I apologize for the late post today, friends. We are having some crazy snow here in Georgia and I have spent the majority of my day playing in it and mopping up after it. So the tally for today is:

Times I've fallen on my butt: 2
Times I've wiped runny noses: 347 and still counting
Loads of wet laundry done: 5 (Funny story, that. Last night my husband SOMEONE flushed the upstairs toilet, which decided it did NOT like that at all and overflowed onto our bathroom floor for some time. Well, it leaked down the wall and out onto the floor in my pantry downstairs. ON THE COLDEST NIGHT OF THE YEAR. Super. This morning all seems to be alright, no buckling wood floors, but then again, once the ice melts outside we might be in for it.)
Yummy meals cooked in the CrockPot: 1
Dogs I've nearly murdered: 1

Rinse and repeat, we have another snow day tomorrow!

What's the weather like where you are? (If you live somewhere sunny and warm then LIE TO ME!)

What Women Want

2011-01-07T09:49:00.000-05:00

My friend Meg sent me this to me in an email and I thought it was too funny not to share here.

Happy Weekend, everyone. And by all means, have some wine. :)

Reading and Writing...No Arithmetic Please!

2011-01-05T10:57:00.000-05:00

I've got a few books I'm reading at the moment that I can't seem to put down, and I love that feeling. However, it has created a problem with my writing, because I'd much rather be reading. In an effort to get more writing done, I'm attempting to make reading my reward for finishing my writing for the day.

Do you writers ever get caught reading more than you're writing? Do you think this is helping or hurting your craft?

*Photos courtesy of Google Images

How Not To Look Punched in the Face

2011-01-03T09:00:00.005-05:00

Welcome back, Internet. I missed you. Happy New Year, btw. You look really good, did you know that? Have you done something different with your hair?

So...I don't do resolutions. This denial of resolve has worked for me, because I don't need the added pressure to lose weight, or be more motivated, or whatnot. I'm kind of an anxious person to begin with, and resolutions feel like a prison of my own making. Anyone else feel that way? Like you're setting yourself up for failure? I mean, I'm a writer. Isn't that enough???

My "I refuse to be resolute" plan only becomes a problem after Christmas, when everyone starts TALKING about their resolutions. Hey, Beth. Got a New Year's resolution? And then I have to have that awkward conversation while the Type A idiot who loves to make themselves look superior to everyone person who asked me gets to look all sympathetic and "Oh, poor you" because I don't resolve to DO anything. I am superior in my mediocrity, thank you very much.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I like to set goals. I think that's a healthy thing. But for some reason, calling it a resolution makes me feel like if I don't live up to it THE WORLD WILL EXPLODE. Oopsie, I forgot to count those calories at lunchtime, everyone duck and run for cover!

So to satisfy the resoluters (is that a real word? If it is, great, if not, I'm going to use it to check off number four on my list!) out there, here's a short list of my projections. My hey-that-would-be-cool-if-it-happened items. My maybe-if-the-kid-sleeps-all-night-I'd-have-the-energy-for-this list:

1. See my book agented/published
2. Lose some weight/find some muscle tone (a.k.a the kid is almost four - time to get rid of that flabby middle and stop blaming the baby)
3. Figure out how to do a smoky eye without making myself look like a raccoon and my husband look like a wife beater.
4. Make up a new word.
5. Be kinder, gentler, more patient, and loving.

There. Done. ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?

Are you a resoluter? What are you resolving to do this year? It's okay if you're not - this is a safe space ;)

Merry Christmas, Internet!

2010-12-17T10:00:00.000-05:00

My 3 year old son is OBSESSED with Rudolph, who he affectionately calls "Rudoll" (making me think that Santa's lead reindeer is somehow a cast member from that Nazi movie that Brad Pitt starred in). Anyway, I was looking for a cute RUDOLPH picture, and I stumbled across this little comic, and thought it was funny. COME ON, PEOPLE, I live in Georgia, where kids are taught to hunt straight out of the womb (and equipped with Skoal and muddin' tires for when they get their driver's license). What did you expect?

I hope that everyone has a wonderful Christmas and a very Happy New Year. Be safe if you're traveling, and I'll see you back here on January 3rd!

Grab A Cupcake and Weigh In...With Your Opinion, That Is

2010-12-15T11:14:00.000-05:00

It's National Cupcake Day!

I love when they give special days to the most random things, like National Talk Like A Pirate Day. If I knew all of your addresses I would send you each a dozen of these, my favorite, RED VELVET cupcakes. Mmmm, can't you just taste the cream cheese frosting? (No, I don't know what my obsession is with sweets lately either. It COULD possibly be that since my husband is a teacher he brings home a boatload of homemade sweets almost daily during this time of year. I'm not complaining...at least I won't until I can't button my pants.)

Now watch how I tie this into writing. Ready?

What is your go-to food for snacking while writing? Mine is usually a bag of chips or something salty (of course, not as of late) and a GINORMOUS caffeinated beverage (preferably a Coke from McDonalds). Perhaps chocolate? A glass of wine? Both (nothing wrong with that at all!)? I always like to find out more about my readers and fellow writers!

Happy Writer Wednesday, everyone. Now go grab a snack and get back to work!

Is It Too Early For Memory Loss?

2010-12-14T11:51:00.000-05:00

Internet, I'm going to let you in on a little secret: I'll be thirty before the New Year.

Why would I be bringing attention to this fact? Because it could possibly explain why my brain seems to have been replaced by figgy pudding (which, I have never in my life tried, nor do I ever plan to). I literally don't even know what day it is anymore. Which is, by the way, why I am posting Mommy Monday on a TUESDAY.

People say things to me like, "Oh, thirty is the new twenty!" These people, I believe, are the same people who say, "Forty is the new thirty!" or "Fifty is the new forty!" or "You know they make hair dye to cover that, right?" NOT HELPFUL. I'm just going to put my big girl pants (with my Spanx underneath them, thank you very much) on and face it:

I am getting old.

And before you go telling me your age, and how if I think thirty is old then I think YOU must be REALLY old because you're (enter any age here older than thirty here) and I shouldn't be complaining, remember, if you will, the imminence of YOUR OWN 30th birthday. Did you have that perspective? Then do me a favor and let me have my moment, hm?

See, I've got the grumpy old lady thing DOWN! Now somebody give me a hand putting on my pantyhose and shawl so I can go to the grocery store and stand in the middle of the aisle and NOT MOVE for the woman with two screaming children behind me. If I can't hear them, they don't exist! :)

You Too Can Survive The Holidays

2010-12-10T13:16:00.000-05:00

There seriously should be a self help book for getting through the holidays. Maybe I'll write it one day, you know, pending I actually SURVIVE this Christmas. It'll be like an advent calendar combined with a weight loss program and filled with daily reminders TO NOT KILL SOMEONE.

Ahem.

Something that has made the craziness of this Christmas season just a bit more bearable is the Portable North Pole . You can go to this site and design a custom message from Santa to your child. It even allows you to enter specific information like behaviors you've had them work on this year (we set ours so Santa would see that we've had our boys working on being nice to one another), your child's age, and even what city you live in so that it show's Santa's sleigh route on a GPS screen. Needless to say, it has been a total hit with our kids. Our three year old, Tyler, has watched his EVERY DAY.

So go make a message for your kid from Santa. Then sit back and sip your spiked eggnog, and watch as your children squeal with delight.

Have a great weekend everyone. I'll see y'all here on Mommy Monday, unless of course, I get into a fight while Christmas shopping at Target and decide to deck something other than the halls! and we'll talk about baking cookies, or as I like to call it BUYING COOKIES!

Hitting the Wall

2010-12-08T11:29:00.000-05:00

I had really good intentions to get a decent Writer Wednesday post written this week. I sat down to write it a dozen times, and got distracted EVERY time. Do you ever have days (or even weeks) like this? It could just be the holidays making me crazy, but I cannot seem to get my act together when it comes to stringing words together. Not for this blog, and certainly not for my manuscripts. What's a girl to do?

What do you do when you feel like you've hit the creative wall? Do you power through, or do you give yourself a break?

I'm off to find some Oreos. I have a feeling they will greatly help my situation. If you disagree, feel free to keep that information to yourself. ;)

Meet Santa's Younger Brother

2010-12-06T10:53:00.000-05:00

Internet, meet Junior Claus.

Junior Claus

Junior is Santa's younger brother. He was unceremoniously dropped down our fireplace the other evening along with a note to our boys explaining who he is and where he came from. Apparently, Junior has been getting into too much trouble up in the North Pole, so Santa dropped him off at our house so we could keep an eye on him (because Santa thinks I have time to keep an eye on ONE MORE TROUBLEMAKER?! Seriously, Santa. You better make the present a good one this year.).

Junior has also been instructed by Santa to keep an eye on our boys, and report back weather they've been naughty or nice. If Junior does not complete his task, he will not be allowed to ride back to the North Pole with Santa on Christmas Eve.

The kids absolutely love Junior. The first thing my oldest son said when I woke him up this morning was, "Can I go find Junior?" Junior was hiding in the kitchen after trying to pour himself a bowl of cereal. The kids thought this was absolutely hilarious, and they can't wait to see what other silly things Junior does.

Junior loves "Frosted" Flakes

I cannot take credit for this idea. I was inspired by the Elf on the Shelf and Elf Magic dolls. Because December snuck up on me this year, I wasn't able to get the elf in time, so I got Junior from the grocery store in the middle of buying bacon and yogurt sticks. Improvisation is a mother's greatest weapon, people. That, and "Because I said so."

Because I Don't Really Cook

2010-12-03T11:48:00.001-05:00

I don't usually tune in to Rachael Ray's talk show to see what meal she's cooking up, because, well, I don't cook all that much. I mean, I'm not completely inept...I make a mean fajita. But yesterday, I was flipping through the channels while folding laundry and came across her show. The first thing that grabbed me was that she had Stefan (Paul Wesley) from The Vampire Diaries on (go ahead, I'll give you a moment to daydream about Damon (Ian Somerholder), because you know he's the real reason we all watch TVD, am I right.).

Then, she had on this couple, Suzanne Cleary and Peter Harding, who are hand dancers. Sounds strange right? It is, but it is also incredibly awesome! Apparently, they are a YouTube sensation, and if you take the two minutes to watch this video, you will see why. A-mazing. It's like Riverdance, but with their hands!!!

Happy Weekend, Everyone!

Who Do You Write For?

2010-12-01T10:48:00.000-05:00

What's selling? What's hot? Are you wishing you were a delinquent reality star just so you could get a foot in the door for a book deal? How much are you willing to change in order to please the industry?

At the writer's conference I attended, I had an editor tell me that my type of book isn't selling, and I had an agent tell me to change my title, yet she requested a full manuscript. A little bit confusing? I think so. There is so much subjectivity out there it's scary. So who do we listen to?

I would imagine that if you're an unpublished author you would move heaven and earth to please an agent or an editor (I changed my title, by the way). But what about those who are already published? I wonder if they feel the pressure to bend to please the industry professionals as much as someone who is trying to get that foot in the door.

What do you think? Should unpublished authors do "whatever" they're told to please the industry? Published authors, do you still feel the pressure to change everything you're told to?

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

I might get out of bed for Edward

2010-11-29T12:39:00.000-05:00

Today is Cyber Monday. I had no idea such a thing existed. You can do a heck of a lot of online shopping for really cheap stuff today if you need it, or couldn't get it on Black Friday. Confession: I'm not good at coupons. I envy the women who roll around the grocery store with binders and envelopes stuffed full of them. I've just never gotten the knack for it. Yes, I love getting a good deal, but I don't live for it. I don't wake up early in the morning for it. I know, my husband is a lucky, lucky man, isn't he?

Naturally, I don't do Black Friday. I don't really care if I can get something that costs fifty dollars for twenty, or something that costs five hundred for a hundred. Do not even whisper the words "3 in the morning" within earshot of me or there will be blood, and, trust me, it'll be yours.

What I didn't know (and discovered this year) is that you can still get some pretty awesome Black Friday deals at a normal hour, like noon. Our family ventured out of the house from our turkey-induced stupor at lunchtime the day after Thanksgiving to find something OTHER than turkey to eat. We got burgers, and after all that turkey y'all, those burgers were DI-VINE.

We decided after our lunch to poke around the stores in our burger joint area to see if there were any deals left to be had. And let me tell you...OLD NAVY T-SHIRTS FOR FIVE DOLLARS!!! AND CUTE SHOES 50% OFF AT KOHLS!!!

Okay, so I am kind of getting the Black Friday thing, and the idea of shopping online on Cyber Monday whilst still in my Twilight pj's is appealing. But I'm still not getting up at 3 in the morning for a t-shirt. Not even if it's free. Not even if you told me Robert Pattinson (Edward from Twilight - yes, I'm a loser) himself had worn it. Okay, maybe then I'd think about it.

P.S. You're welcome.

Did you get any good Black Friday deals? Did you know today is Cyber Monday?

Happy Thanksgiving!

2010-11-24T19:26:00.000-05:00

Wishing everyone a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Cautionary Tales

2010-11-22T15:44:00.000-05:00

I've been cleaning for the last 2 days in preparation for my family being here for Thanksgiving. Cleaning, even though I'm sick and what I would really rather do is get into my bed and sleep until Thanksgiving Day when I hear my mom say, "Turkey's done!"

I don't know why I even bother, because I know that when my mother gets here she will absolutely insist on mopping my floors even though I've already mopped them and cleaning my stove even though...well, that one might be justified. Don't get me wrong, it's not like she whips out a white glove when she gets here to check for dust bunnies, it's just WHO SHE IS. My mom is an unstoppable domestic force, cooking and cleaning are her forte. Mine? Not so much.

Anyway, to my point: PEOPLE WITHOUT CHILDREN WHO ARE SOMEDAY PLANNING TO HAVE THEM, LISTEN UP, because I'm about to give you the best advice you will ever get. Are you ready?

DON'T BUY ANY MORE NEW THINGS. Why, you ask? Well, because YOUR FUTURE CHILDREN WILL DESTROY THEM. So that new furniture set that you think you just have to get before you have kids and have no money for any other selfish purchases? Yeah, they'll spill chocolate milk on it and you'll have to buy a new one anyway. So yeah, better hold off on that idea. Oh, and that expensive Persian rug you've been eyeing at Pottery Barn? Chances are they'll barf or pee on it, so pump the breaks a little bit. Mkay?

Whew. Good deed done for the day. Off to clean the toilets (and what I really mean is the floors AROUND the toilets because 3 year olds are also not good at aiming).

My Pen is Going on Holiday

2010-11-17T10:47:00.000-05:00

"Going on Holiday" sounds so British, doesn't it? And on that British note, how excited is everyone that Prince William is finally engaged to Kate Middleton? I'm BEYOND excited. I'm a total Anglophile. I wonder if my husband will let me fly to England for the wedding?

Sorry.

I think my brain has gone into mush-mode post writer's conference. I can barely pick up the pen to write my grocery list, let alone start my second novel. I've decided that I'm taking a mini-break before I gear up to write the next book. And what better time to take a break than the holidays. Bring on the gravy, people.

In the meantime though, I'm going to practice p -- . Wait, let me try that again. I'm going to practice plo --. Hmm, once more. I'm going to practice PLOTTING. I ran into a ton of trouble with my first book for lack of planning. While I still very much enjoy sitting on the pantser side of the fence, I'm really striving with this second book to know where I'm going before I begin the journey. At least a little bit.

On that note, I want to direct you to Jill Kemerer's blog, because she's doing an excellent series on writing the synopsis before you write the book. Cool concept, huh? I think I might just try it, you know, after I'm done devouring every morsel of my mother's cooking and figuring out how to lose the weight so I can fit into my dress for the Royal Wedding next year. Ahem.

Oops, I did it again

2010-11-15T15:55:00.000-05:00

I played with your heart...got lost in the game...oh baby baby.

No, I didn't get on here to sing old Britney Spears songs to you. (I do, however, feel like a SLAVE for you sometimes, Internet). ;)

Anyway, I just wanted to apologize for my unannounced absence last week. I took a small vacation and then my brain thought, "That was amazing. Let's do that for a bit longer, shall we?" But I'm back now, and can I just say HOLY IT'S NOT EVEN THANKSGIVING YET AND I HAVE JINGLE BELLS IN MY HEAD. People, you know how I feel about this. If you don't, you can read about it here. Christmas comes after Thanksgiving. AFTER. THE. TURKEY.

Okay, I feel a little better.

On this Mommy Monday, I just had to tell you about my favorite new product, and NO, I'm not being paid to say this. I was strolling through our local Walmart the other day (which I do frequently), and I came across these new greeting cards from Hallmark. They're called Edge of Motherhood and they are HILARIOUS. I'm always looking for ways to make my mommy friends laugh, and I am WISHING that I had come up with the idea for these myself. This one is a personal favorite:

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

Come on, you know you've done it too!

Feel up to writing your own mommy (or daddy) greeting card? Take a stab in the comments. I'll announce my favorite next monday!

Lessons Learned from My First Writer's Conference - Part 2

2010-11-03T12:28:00.000-04:00

In last Wednesday's post, Lessons Learned From My First Writer's Conference - Part 1, I shared with you that the publishing industry is totally subjective, something that you may or may not have already known.

I'd also like to share is that it is really helpful to decide what exactly you want to get out of the conference before you go. Are you wanting to learn more about the craft of writing? Do you want to learn more about the publishing process? Do you want to gain a better understanding of the legal aspects of the business? Do you need to be inspired by other authors who have already established themselves?

I was completely torn when it came to the course offerings. There were one or two classes that I KNEW I wanted to take, so I did. As for the others, I was a little bit lost. I made the mistake of not really honing in on what I wanted to learn from the courses they offered, so I don't think I truly maximized my experience in that way.

I did, however, take advantage of the opportunity to network with other writers, which I feel like was the most rewarding experience. The writing community is incredibly supportive (which I already know because of so many of YOU!), but I was really struck by the unspoken bond between myself and all of these complete strangers. I met a few people (the lovely Angie Mizzell, for one) who I know are going to do great things, and it totally energized me.

I also took it upon myself to get in front of agents and editors that I really wanted to meet. On that note, I have to admit that my first "meeting" with the lovely Rachelle Gardner was...in the bathroom! Now, I know you've heard the horror stories from agents about being pitched to in the bathroom, and I was WELL AWARE of that major faux pas, I assure you. I did not do that. What I did, however, was giggle when she came out of the stall...purely from the irony of it all. I'm sure she thought, "Who is this weird chick laughing to herself in the bathroom?" But I actually made a joke of it and told her I was absolutely NOT pitching to her in the bathroom. And you know what? She laughed. Who knew? AGENTS ARE REAL PEOPLE TOO!

Have you been to a conference? What lesson did you learn? Were you able to get what you wanted out of it?

Wherein I Chase The Garbage Truck Down The Street

2010-11-01T10:42:00.000-04:00

So.

Mommy Monday started off with a bang - literally. Ran downstairs with my toothbrush still in my mouth to find my youngest child screaming because his art easel had fallen down on him. He wasn't hurt (it's not that heavy), but still not a great way to start a morning.

I blame the Halloween candy. He was probably trying to climb the thing, still shaking with the after effects of too much sugar last night. Y'all, we got an OBSCENE amount of candy. I'm blaming my husband not pointing any fingers or anything, but I think my kids might've knocked on every door in the neighborhood.

My oldest doesn't have school today, something about accreditation and whatnot. Really I just think his school is SUPER SMART not making kids come in the day after Halloween. I can't imagine the devastation THAT storm must leave in its wake. Oh wait, YES I CAN BECAUSE IT'S IN MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW.

So I throw my uber-hot, oversized sweatshirt on over my tank top and yoga pants (that I may or may not have slept in) and get both kids in the car to take little man to school. We make it there with less than a minute to spare, meaning a minute before drop-off ends and I will be forced to get out of my car in my uber-hot sweatshirt and yoga pants and WALK MY KID INTO SCHOOL LOOKIN' LIKE A HOT MESS. Phew.

But.

Then I get home and realize that the garbage truck is down my street, past my house...AND MY GARBAGE CAN IS NOT SITTING AT THE CURB. Which means it hasn't been put there, and my already overflowing trash has not been picked up. I hightail it out of my truck and into my backyard to grab the garbage can.

What happens next, I swear, is straight out of a movie. I have to FLAG DOWN the garbage truck driver in my HOT MESS OF AN OUTFIT and BEG him to stop and take my trash. And you know what he said?

"We only stop for the cute ones!"

Thank you, kind garbage man. Thank you very much.

A Halloween Public Service Announcement

2010-10-29T10:19:00.000-04:00

This is a repeat post from last year, but I think it will serve you well. Stay safe out there this weekend!

*My Buzz and Woody - Halloween 2009*

LESSONS I LEARNED FROM HALLOWEEN 2009

1. You CAN get a hangover from candy. The remedy? MORE CANDY.

2. Your child COULD be allergic to his costume. But since you paid $40 for it, you WILL give him Benadryl and tell him to buck up.

3. Carving three pumpkins = insanity.

4. Use old Christmas lights to light your pumpkin instead of an actual candle if you're going to be leaving your house on Halloween. That way, your house doesn't burn down and everyone can still enjoy the stenciled-on ghost face that your husband painstakingly carved out of your enormous pumpkin. Everyone wins.

5. Buy a smaller pumpkin next year.

6. Trick or treating in the cold and rain is still fun for kids. For adults...not so much.

7. Make sure you're invited to a friend's house where this recipe is being served. Trust me.

8. Make sure that friend is a great photographer, because you might get just about the cutest picture you've ever seen of your kid in a costume.

And now a word about the Fall Back time change: When you think it's a good idea to stay over at your friend's house and keep your kids up later so that they'll "sleep in" the next morning instead of waking up an hour earlier? IT'S NOT.

That is all.

You're welcome.

Lessons Learned from My First Writer's Conference - Part 1

2010-10-27T11:09:00.000-04:00

To sum up what I learned at the South Carolina Writer's Workshop annual conference would be that this? This business? Of writing? Yeah, it's TOTALLY subjective. What one person might LOVE another person might HATE.

I sat through one particular class called a slush-fest, which basically boils down to a real-time critique of the first 2 pages of your manuscript (or some people chose their query letter and first page of their ms). They collected everyone's submissions as they walked through the door and then placed them up on an overhead projector to rip them to shreds. Or at least, that's what I THOUGHT would happen, seeing as how that's what I had heard happened in those sorts of situations.

Well.

Not so with this one. The editor* was totally gracious to her audience, saying mostly what she liked about everyone's work with a small suggestion here or there about what could improve. There was no yelling, no "What were they thinking?", no "Wow, that was awful." None of that. That is, until she got to the very last submission, and guess whose it was?

Mine.

She read it aloud, as she did the twenty or so before it, and when she got to the end (we were running short on time) she said, "I like the voice, good idea, but THESE BOOKS AREN'T SELLING."

I'm sorry, WHAT? Could you repeat that?

Needless to say, I was a little bit depressed. I didn't have time to ask her if she could expound on the subject, because I was late for a pitch session. Ha. Yeah, I was supposed to go pitch a book that WILL NOT SELL to a literary agent after that. That pitch session did not go well.

BUT.

My mama raised me to get back on the horse after I've been thrown, and gosh darn it, I did. I marched into my next pitch session (which was literally ten minutes after I bombed the first) and I nailed it. Said exactly what I wanted to say and got a full manuscript request.

*On a side note, I was able to pull that editor aside after dinner to ask her for a little more info (prettyprettyplease) about what she had said earlier. And what I got was a chance to send her some of my pages to get some feedback. Feedback. From an editor. At a huge publishing company. It pays to get back on the horse!!!

What has been your experience? Have some loved your work? Some hated? Do you agree that the industry is subjective?

Come back next Wednesday for Part 2.

What A Difference A Day Makes

2010-10-25T17:26:00.000-04:00

So, as you may know (since I've been beating you over the head with it for the last two weeks), I got to go to the South Carolina Writer's Conference this past weekend. And while I learned A TON about the craft of writing and the publishing business (all of which I will tell you about on Wednesday when my brain stops hurting), what I really wanted to say is...I MISSED MY KIDS.

And THAT, my friends, is the conclusion a mother comes to after TWO WHOLE NIGHTS of uninterrupted sleep.

Out of Office

2010-10-18T10:09:00.001-04:00

Well...not technically :)

I won't be blogging this week, as I am preparing for my VERY FIRST WRITER'S CONFERENCE EVER!!!

Come back and see me next Monday, won't you?

*Cartoon courtesy of Google Images

Just Because

2010-10-15T11:47:00.000-04:00

I just wanted to drop in real quick and say a huge THANK YOU to all of you who have encouraged me over the last couple of weeks with regard to my upcoming conference and my writing in general. I'm still freaking out, but have a peace (God-given to be sure) that everything will work out the way it is supposed to. I'm not going to be blogging next week, as it will be THE WEEK (I leave next Friday morning!), but I wanted to leave you with a little gift (an intangible one, but a gift nonetheless).

Girls, these are for you...

Boys, this one's for you...

Happy Friday everyone, and I'll see you all back on Monday, the 25th, with plenty of stories and stuff I learned from the conference.

It's Not You, It's Me...Well, It's A Little You

2010-10-13T15:40:00.000-04:00

I apologize for my lack of post-age (say it like Pauly Shore). I'm not intentionally ignoring you, dear Internet. I'm just really trying to get my stuff together for this conference that is NEXT WEEK!

*grabs a bag* *hyperventilates for a moment* *puts bag down* *smooths hair*

I finally polished up the synopsis to an agreeable level, that level being one where I don't want to kill msyelf after I've read it (score one for Team Beth) and am currently working on my one-sheet. Business cards have been ordered (and they are SUPER cute thanks to my good friend Jodi at Leapfrog Creations) and outfits have been chosen.

I'm also trying really hard not to re-read my manuscript over and over to the point of insanity, because this girl? She likes to edit things into non-existence. If I were an actress, I would NEVER watch my own movies because I am way too critical. Okay, maybe I would, but only because in MY movies (the ones in my head) I would always be co-starring with...well, you don't need to hear that now do you? Maybe someday I'll tell, like if my book gets published and then made into a movie, because then it will be OBVIOUS!

Where are you in your journey? Drafting? Editing? Querying? Hyperventilating? Waiting?

Pumpkin Stuff - It'll Change Your Life

2010-10-08T07:52:00.000-04:00

This is a repost, but I thought it was appropriate for the time of year. This recipe is TO DIE FOR...so go out, get your ingredients, and get to it!

Happy (almost) Halloween!!

My sweet friend, Jodi, shared this AMAZING recipe, and I thought that all of you beautiful people deserved to have it, too. Speaking of amazing things, Jodi is an incredibly talented photographer and graphic designer, so you should also hop on over to Leapfrog Creations and check out her site. Thanks, Jodi, for the delicious recipe!

Pumpkin Stuff

1 15 oz. of canned pumpkin
1 can of evaporated milk
1 cup of sugar, regular white
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
3 Eggs (slightly beaten)

Mix all of that in a bowl, pour in a greased 9 X 13 pan

On top of that spread the following 3 ingredients below: Do not make the cake as directed, just crumble the whole cake mix, just powder stuff, on top of the pumpkin mixture. You can add the pecans if you want. I didn't and it was still awesome. But I am sure it would be great with them, because they would be on the top and they would get all toasted up YUM!! Yes, I said just the powder stuff, just trust me, it will work. On top of the cake mix and nuts, as evenly as you can, pour on the 2 sticks of butter. If there are some areas that are still powdery, it works out, so don't worry.

1 Yellow Butter Cake Mix
1 cup chopped Pecans (optional)
2 sticks of butter, melted

Bake in a 350 oven for 50 - 60 minutes

Frosting: Make while the pumpkin stuff is baking

1 8 oz. block of cream cheese (softened)
1 cup powdered sugar
2 cups of Cool Whip (thawed)

Mix these 3 ingredients together. I got out the electric mixer to make it smooth, but the recipe didn't call for that. After the Pumpkin Stuff has cooled, smear the frosting all over. Quite delicious still warm, but I think even better cold, the next day. Store in the fridge, if there is anything left.

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

Conference Jitters

2010-10-06T10:28:00.000-04:00

I'll be attending the South Carolina Writers Workshop Conference in just about two weeks, and I have MUCH to do. I'm putting the final touches on my synopsis, one-sheet, and ordering my business cards.

I have to be honest...it feels a little surreal. I'm not just talking to family and blog friends about being a writer - I'm actually going to be talking to agents (I have a pitch session with THE Rachelle Gardner - this is my happy dance *I apologize for the H-word*) and editors and authors (people who have actually PUBLISHED something!) about my being a writer. *deep breath*

I'm trying not to let myself get psyched out. I've done the work, I've done the research - now all I have to do is put myself out there and see what happens. Hopefully, it won't be a train wreck. Hopefully, I won't make any embarrassing mistakes. HOPEFULLY someone will like my idea.

If not? Well, at least I'll have two nights of uninterrupted sleep and I'll get to eat at least 4 meals without my kids asking if they can have some (and by "some" they mean "ALL" of it).

There's always a silver lining, right? :)

Are you nervous about anything right now? Can you find the silver lining?

Whistle While You Work

2010-10-04T10:09:00.001-04:00

I woke up smiling today, and that is NOT something that happens very frequently, trust me (or just ask my husband, remember he got me this shirt?). It could be the gorgeous weather outside, which is sunny and cold enough to drink a caramel apple cider (my favorite!) without sweating to death. However, I'm pretty sure it's because we're all healthy again, having put the terror that is the stomach virus behind us.

TANGENT ALERT: Why on earth is it referred to as a stomach bug? A bug is something small (unless you live in Florida - then I get it. Those palmetto bugs are HUGE!) that can be easily squashed. Calling the heinous and destructive virus that went through our house a "bug" just doesn't seem to do it justice - stomach ninja or stomach assassin seems more appropriate, don't you think?

I'm off to clean up some of the aftermath of last week. Wish I had some furry forest creatures like the lucky, er, girl up there in the picture to help me do it - WHY CAN'T FAIRY TALES BE TRUE??? But before I go, I want to say THANK YOU to all of you who sent prayers and well wishes our way this last week...I appreciated them so very much.

Whose fairy tale would you like to live?

a) Snow White

b) Sleeping Beauty

c) Cinderella

d) Belle (Beauty and the Beast)

(My answer is D - she might live with a beast, but he's got a GREAT library!)

What Day Is It?

2010-10-01T11:22:00.000-04:00

*Photo courtesy of Google Images

I've just recovered from a vicious stomach bug, which attacked 3 of the 4 people in this house. I can honestly say I have never loved my husband (the only one spared from this horrifying virus - you'll see why in a moment) more than I do right now. He is my hero, my knight in shining armor, wielding his can of Lysol like a sword and slaying the invisible germs of death with ease.

Internet, I can do colds. I can do sore throats, stuffy heads, coughing, and sneezing. What I CANNOT do is puking. And OHHHH THE PUKING that happened in this house two nights ago. Oh, I'm sorry. Does the word "puke" make you uncomfortable? PUUUUUUKE.* At one point, I'm pretty sure I asked the Good Lord to take me home, and I'm almost sure I meant it. I wanted to die. I thought I was dying.

Every once in a while I would see a strange Avatar-like creature with a blue face and blue hands. I thought it could be an angel, only the angels I'd read about in the Bible weren't blue. Only after the fever broke did I realize it was my sweet husband wearing a blue medical mask and blue latex gloves on his hands, deftly avoiding the plague that was upon us. I married a smarty, Internet.

Today is the first day I'm actually able to get out of bed without feeling like I'm going to fall over, what with all the dehydration and lack of food and all. And it feels GLORIOUS. The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and the weather is lovely. I'm going to sit outside and enjoy the fresh air this weekend, and I hope you all can do the same.

Happy Weekend, everyone!

*I apologize for my rudeness. I blame the virus. I believe the adorable cat picture makes up for it? No? I'll try again next week.

Plotters and Pantsers and Pretty Woman, Oh My!

2010-09-29T10:25:00.000-04:00

The lovely Roni Loren over at Fiction Groupie did a great post a couple of weeks ago on Plotters vs. Pantsers. I remember reading it thinking that I am absolutely a pantser, just like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman (minus the hooker part, of course). I even replayed the scene in my head where Julia's character, Vivian, says to Richard Gere's character, Edward (no, you can't call him "Eddie"), "I'm more of a fly by the seat of my pants kinda gal."

However, my pantser story doesn't end with a man hanging out of the top of a white limo wielding flowers in lieu of a sword, clearly coming to my rescue. Lord, I wish it did. (Actually, I would give him a red sharpie instead of a sword, to slash my manuscript to pieces. I would call him "Eddy", short for EDITOR...get it? I know, I'm insane.) Instead my pantser story ends with me pulling my already thinning hair out because I've lost myself in my story. I'm up to my eyeballs in edits and I can now see the gaping holes due to my lack of preparation (just like Roni said I would!). Can I fix them? Most likely. Will it be painful? Absolutely.

Thankfully, I have already begun to learn from my mistakes, creating a rough outline for my second book before I even BEGIN to write it. I don't want to get too detailed with my outline, because I'm still a pantser and I thoroughly enjoy not knowing ALL the details before I write (because a lot of them change in the process anyway). I do hope, however, that at least with a rough outline of my plot and characters that I won't find myself in such a stressful position the next time around.

What about you? Plotter or Pantser - or a little of both? Has being either one given you trouble in the longrun?

Momisms

2010-09-27T15:32:00.000-04:00

A great friend of mine from college, Lauren, recently opened a discussion on Facebook asking her friends to post their "momisms". For example, Lauren shared this little gem: I have mastered the art of a quick shower...I am a mom.

Below are just some of the awesome responses. I've taken the liberty of borrowing some of them and fixing them because I'm anal like that, so that they all sound the same. Hope you enjoy reading them as much as I did.

I have realized I will never be on time for anything again in my life. I have gone to work with spit up in my hair and not noticed till noon...I am a mom.
I have realized I will not be able to poop alone for many years...I am a mom.
I have an arsenal of statements at the ready so that I don't have to share my food (This is too spicy for you, Oops - I ate it all, This is really gross - you don't want this) ...I am a mom.
I have learned to eat an entire meal while nursing...I am a mom.
I now look for coupons for Preparation H...I am a mom.
At the store, I push a cart filled with about 50lbs of human before I ever even get to the supplies...I am a mom. *
I fart in public and then blame the kid closest to me - works every time...I am a mom. *
I know the names of every character in the cartoons and have seen almost every episode at least twice...I am a mom.
There are days that I dont have time to brush my teeth till I'm going to bed...I am a mom!
I have perfected the evaluation of each successive cry of, "Dad!" by intensity, volume, and urgency, and no longer appear until actually needed...I am a mom. *
I not only know all of the lyrics to the Spongebob theme song, as I am singing it with my 11 year old, the baby is spitting squash in my face and I don't miss a note...I am a mom.
I have mastered using my left hand to hold my breast pump and painting my toenails with my right hand...I am a mom (with cute toes).*

*Denotes a personal favorite

What is your momism? Feel free to chime in. Dads and parents of furry kids are welcome too!

Is There A Dog Barking?

2010-09-24T11:45:00.000-04:00

I mumbled that exact question to my husband sometime in the middle of the night last night. His response? ZZZZZZ. Then I hit him gently prodded him and said, "Do you hear that?" He didn't. About 10 minutes later, our youngest child came into our room crying and saying his throat hurt. Then he let out a sound that was not at all childlike, more like what a child might sound like if it swallowed a grenade and then burped.

So I took little man back to his room and snuggled for an hour before he fell back to sleep. This morning we went to the doctor, because we're headed into the weekend and I did not want to have to make a trip to the ER if this thing got worse. Plus, I'm going to a conference starting today, and didn't want to leave the husband with a sick kid and no meds.

My doctor said it first, "Was it a seal-like barking sound?" Why yes, actually, yes it was. I wonder if doctors are required to take a zoology class in med school to learn to identify animals by their barks, because she totally hit it out of the park. One yucky throat swab and a few tears later, he was diagnosed with croup. CROUP. Ugh. One prescription and a Spiderman sticker later, and we were headed home.

Here's hoping your weekend doesn't involve a barking seal - unless you're going to the zoo, because that's WAY more fun.

The View From Where I Sit

2010-09-22T15:13:00.000-04:00

We all write in different places and on different types of computers (or maybe you prefer to use paper and pen?). I thought I'd share the place where I do the majority of my writing: my kitchen table. Occasionally, I will get out of my house and write at Starbucks, Barnes and Noble, or the library. Most of the time, though, I'm sitting right here, surrounded by laundry and toys to be picked up (hopefully with a large caffeinated beverage and flowers from my sweet hubby to get me through it).

I used to say, "I can't write at home, it's just too distracting." Then I realized that I was using that excuse as a crutch. Many of us don't have the luxury of being alone and undistracted while we write. Maybe you're a mom like me, constantly interrupted by questions from your children (or distracted by the mere thought of your children: What is he doing right now? I hope he ate a good lunch today. I hope he's not getting into trouble. Did I remember to sign that form?). Maybe you're like me in that sometimes there just isn't enough time to get in the car and drive to one of those places and write for hours. Groceries have to be bought, children have to be dropped off/picked up, doctors have to be seen (Click here for some great tips from author Jody Hedlund on how busy moms can make more writing time).

But the truth is, you have to just DO IT. Writing takes discipline. It takes passion. It takes determination. Put your butt in the chair and WRITE, even if it's just thirty minutes a day, like exercise! Exercise for your craft! Allow yourself the luxury of putting down the laundry, it'll still be there when you get back (though don't neglect it for too long, otherwise you might be faced with a situation like this). If I can do it, so can you.

What's the view like from where YOU sit? Do you get easily distracted when you write at home? What distracts you?

Love It/Hate It: Nifty Fifty Edition

2010-09-20T10:24:00.000-04:00

Internet, my mom is 50 years old today. She probably won't appreciate me sharing that with all of you, but I don't really care (see, Mom? I told you I'd get back at your for giving me bangs one day). I was fortunate enough to be able to fly home and surprise her this weekend and attend her surprise 50th birthday party, and it was awesome.

In honor of my sweet mom, I'd like to share with you some things I love/hate about her (don't worry, there's only one "hate").

Love It:
- That we talk all the time. My mom is my best friend and the best advice-giver EVER. I know too many women that have strained relationships with their mothers, that feel judged or incapable around them, and I am very grateful that is not the case with my own.

- She has a heart of gold. She is a giver: meals for friends who are hurting, her time and energy, but most of all, LOVE. She genuinely LOVES people.

- She is SO funny. We laugh at the same things, and sometimes we say the same things at the same time, making us laugh even harder.

- Her faith is strong. She loves God and she might tell you about him, but not without SHOWING you how much she loves Him by the way that she treats you first.

- She is the absolute best Grammy to my kids.

- She is the glue that holds our family together.

Hate It:
- She lives in Florida. I live in Georgia. That is my only complaint!

I love you, Mom. I hope that you have the best birthday ever. I'm praying for 50 more years, because I don't know what I'd do without you.

xoxo

Writing Is...

2010-09-15T10:27:00.000-04:00

I'm off to make some serious edits on my ms...so on today's Writer Wednesday, I'd really like to hear from all of you.

Tell me what writing is to you. Obsession? Therapy? Hobby? A job? Use as many words or as few as you like. You may begin...now.

Mommy's Getting a Makeover

2010-09-13T09:00:00.006-04:00

Is it fall yet? Because I always get this stirring in my bones when fall is around the corner - time to change things up a bit. A few weeks ago, I gave myself bangs. If you knew me in the early 90's you know that this is MAJOR because I had an unfortunate bang situation for most of my adolescence (thanks, Mom!). I might try to color my hair (what I have left of it anyway) tonight...who knows.

AND as you may have noticed (or may have not, so I'll blatantly point it out to you) This Mommy's Life has a new look. Yep, it's still the same blog, just under new management. Mommy's getting her act together. I hope you like it - it is TOTALLY me, except it's missing something. Hmmm. OH! How could I forget, the BIRD ELEMENT. We all know I'm a crazy bird lady.

When I went looking for pretty birds, LOOK what I found on Etsy! LOOK AT THESE BEAUTIFUL PRINTS!

Those last two are my favorites! I can't wait to sell my first book (fingers crossed/toes crossed/eyes crossed/KrisKross'll make you JUMP JUMP! I told you...early 90's), because I will buy up this ENTIRE Etsy shop by YumiYumi.

Enjoy your Monday, everyone. I'm off to Starbucks to get a pumpkin spice latte, because it's fall...right?

Help for your Query Letter

2010-09-10T10:41:00.000-04:00

Click here for a "How To" on writing your query letter.

Taherah totally nailed it, don't you think? :)

Happy Friday, everyone!

Blood Work And A Peek At My Book

2010-09-08T16:18:00.000-04:00

When I titled Friday's post, There Will Be Blood, I didn't realize that it would be self-fulfilling prophecy.

I spent the better part of my morning sitting in my doctor's office waiting to have my blood drawn because I've been feeling a bit crummy lately. My hair is falling out, I'm tired all the time, I've eaten too many Nutty Bars gained a little bit of weight. You know, the usual happenings of a mother with a 5 and 3 year old.

My brain is fried, and I can't think past my overwhelming desire to go lay down right now (News Flash: Having four vials of blood drawn is not for the already tired and faint of heart!). On the bright side, I've decided to share a little excerpt of my book with you, dear reader. AREN'T YOU EXCITED? I know, try to contain yourself (I'm looking at YOU, MOM).

Feel free to tell me how much you LOVE it what you think. I promise, I won't retaliate if your response is negative. That's the beauty of critiquing someone who can't get out of bed! :)

And now, I give you a snippet of Jeannie and Her Bottles:

When I pull into Lexi’s driveway, she is sitting at the bottom of the front porch steps. Her wild, dark hair is pulled back into a ponytail, and she’s wearing a ripped neck, gray sweatshirt and spandex pants. However, it’s not her clothes that shock me – it's the fact that she’s smoking a cigarette. My sister, the portrait of health and champion of defying premature wrinkles, is smoking a cigarette.

“Alexis Anne Franklin, where did you get that?” I ask, jumping out of the car. Lexi’s middle name is our mother’s first name. Hearing myself say my mother’s name hurts, but I push the thought out of my head and continue reprimanding my older sister, who, at the moment, is acting like anything but. “Those things will kill you, and you don’t even smoke,” I say, slamming the door.

“I bummed it off some teenager,” she says, blowing out a puff of smoke.

“Seriously, Lex. If you don’t put that thing out, I’m going to kill you.”

“Fine.” She puts it out on the step, and flicks the butt at my sandaled feet. I have to jump to miss it.

“Come on, let’s go inside and have a chat,” I say, grabbing her by the arm and dragging her up the stairs. I get a closer look at what’s she’s wearing as I’m dragging, and can't believe it. Lexi prides herself on her appearance. She is always put together - she wears the latest fashion trends and never leaves the house without full makeup and perfectly done hair. To say that I am shocked to see her smoking is one thing; to see her in bad clothes is entirely another. “Love the outfit, Lex. Are you single-handedly trying to bring back the eighties?”

She shrugs and opens her door, and as I follow her in I notice a pathetic looking plant, what might have once been a fern. Lexi loves her plants – you might call her a green thumb – a trait she annoyingly inherited from our mother. Even though I’m the one who spent the most time in my mom’s garden, I still manage to kill every green thing I attempt to grow. If Lexi’s plants are dying, then I know things are getting bad.

I don’t fully realize how bad until I open the door to her apartment. If the cigarette, outfit, and dead fern didn't scare the crap out of me, this certainly does. The garbage can is nearly overflowing, her kitchen table is stacked high with unopened mail, magazine subscriptions, and what looks like…a bunch of mismatched socks? Her kitchen counter is littered with opened and half-eaten frozen dinners and their containers, empty wine bottles, and dirty glasses.

Lexi walks past it all and flops down on the couch, pulling a fuzzy blanket all the way up to her chin.

“Sooo, how was your day?” I ask from the kitchen, carefully prodding an open pizza box and trying to make sense of my surroundings. My sister is also a neat freak, so this is completely uncharacteristic of her. I reach into the cabinet and pull out two juice glasses – for lack of proper stemware – and pour us some wine.

“Oh, just peachy,” she says, mumbling beneath the blanket.

While surveying the wreckage around me, I notice her radio. The plug has been ripped from the electrical socket and is now dangling over the counter.

“I see you finally turned off our friend Delilah," I say, trying to hold back a giggle.

Smudge, Lexi’s huge, aptly-named black cat hops carefully up onto the counter, navigating his way through the debris and looking for someone to pay attention to the backs of his ears.

“Hey, Smudgy,” I say, indulging him for a moment. “At least I see she hasn’t forgotten to feed you.” Smudge looks like he could skip a meal – or ten – and be just fine.

“Yeah, after I turned off Delilah I decided to turn on the television, and guess what was on,” she says.

“Enlighten me,” I say, lifting Smudge off of the counter out of habit. Even with the mess, I can't stand cats on counters - you never know where those feet have been.

“One of those stupid depression medication commercials. You know, the ones that make you want to kill yourself they’re so sad?” she says, obviously irritated.

I laugh, knowing exactly what she's talking about. “Well, you know that’s how they make all their money, right? They depress you with their commercial so that you’ll call your doctor and he’ll prescribe you their medication,” I say, making my way into her living room, glasses of wine in hand.

“Well, it’s a very effective strategy."

I have to step over kicked off shoes and discarded clothing to hand Lexi her cup of wine. Smudge has followed me from the kitchen, hopping stealthily up onto the arm of Lexi’s soft leather couch – the only good thing that came from her marriage to Tom. It suddenly strikes me that the only good thing that came from my own previous relationship was a piece of furniture. What the heck is it with furniture?

I pull her feet up into my lap and cover them with a blanket. Smudge looks at Lexi’s feet, then back at me with his yellow-green eyes, as if I’ve committed a crime. Obviously perturbed, he hops down and finds a comfy place at my feet.

“So what’s up with the landfill in the kitchen?” I ask, taking a sip of my wine.

“Oh, that? I just haven’t gotten around to it,” she says, waving her hand dismissively.

“Well, I think you’d better get to it before it gets to you.” I see one eyebrow twitch, the only proof that she’s heard me at all.

“Are you going to tell me what this is all about or what?” I press, even though I’m pretty sure I already know. She stares blankly at the wall before finally giving in with a sigh.

“I’m just lonely, Pea,” she says, taking a gulp of her wine.

“Pea”, short for Peanut, was my nickname growing up. My initials just happen to be J.I.F. – yes, like the peanut butter – for Jean Irene Franklin. Lexi is the only one in my family who is still allowed to call me by my nickname. My dad started using it a little too frequently in public, so I had to put him on restrictions.

“I hate coming home after a long day of work to this empty apartment,” she continues, laying her head down on the armrest of the couch, her wild curls spilling all over her face. “I hate cooking meals for one,” she says through them. I don’t have the heart to tell her that microwaving doesn’t exactly count as cooking. I rub her feet in an effort to calm her down before she hits full crisis mode. She sits straight up all of a sudden and glares down at my hands, causing me to stop rubbing immediately.

“What?” I ask, putting my hands up like I’m under arrest.

“I hate that my sister has to be the one to rub my feet at the end of the day,” she says, and slumps dramatically back down onto the armrest. I give a little laugh and resume rubbing as she continues in her downward spiral. “I hate that I know he’s out there with that stupid girl, or some stupid girl like her. I hate that he’s not here.” With this last statement, she begins to cry uncontrollably.

I stand up to hand her a box of tissues from the kitchen counter. For a moment, I allow myself to imagine that I might have been a therapist in a previous life. I don’t technically believe in reincarnation, but if I did I would’ve totally been a therapist. Random strangers approach me all the time and tell me their life stories, like I have some sign on my forehead that says TALK TO ME. It’s not that I really mind listening, unless I’m in a hurry to get somewhere. I know that simply listening won’t work on Lexi tonight, so I reach deep into my arsenal of encouraging sentiments. I swear I could write a book with all the material I’ve used to calm my sister down. I’d call it Chicken Soup for a Psychotic Sister’s Soul.

“Sweetie, you know you were too good for him to begin with. He wasn’t right for you.”

“Yeah,” she sniffs. “I know that. It’s just that I can’t…forget him. I try – I really do, but every time I meet a guy, I end up comparing him with Tom…the way he was before he became the guy who cheated on me. I thought everything was great between us. How did this happen?”

I think it over before speaking. Now is definitely not a “told you so” moment.

“I don’t know, Lex,” I say, choosing my words carefully. “Sometimes we can’t see the forest for the trees.”

“I have never understood what that means.” She sighs, taking another big gulp of her wine. I find myself relieved that I didn’t bring over the Cabernet I’ve been saving, because I’m pretty sure my sister isn’t even tasting the wine at this point.

“It means,” I say slowly, “that sometimes we are rendered so incapacitated by our feelings, that we can’t really be objective about reality. You had him up on a pedestal. You cared about him so much that you chose to ignore the truth about who he really was…like the fact that he had cheated on his previous girlfriend with you.” I take a sip of my wine, fully appreciating the taste merely out of principle.

“It’s better you found out after two years instead of twenty, right? I mean, what if you’d had kids or something.”

This is not really new news to Lexi, but for some reason it seems to be sinking in tonight. She finishes her wine and reaches for the bottle, pouring herself another glass and swirling it around. “Yeah, what if we had.” She looks at me and shakes her head, and I can see fresh tears welling in her eyes.

“What is it, Lex?” I ask, suddenly worried that I’ve said something to upset her.

“After I took Tom back. I got…pregnant a month later. I…I had a miscarriage.” With this she collapses into my lap.

After finally registering what my sister has just confided to me, I find myself fighting back tears. I certainly don’t want to make this worse for her, so I stiffen my resolve not to cry. We sit in silence for a moment as she cries and I struggle to get past the shock of her revelation.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I ask, gently smoothing the wily curls away from her tear-stained face.

“You were so upset when I took him back, and it was just so soon after. I thought you would be angry with me. I’m sorry – I should’ve told you.”

“Listen to me,” I say, pulling her chin up so that she can look me in the face. Her hazel eyes – just like our mother’s – are swollen and red. “There is nothing you could do or say that would make me stop loving you. Nothing.”

“Really?” she asks sniffling, finally sitting upright next to me.

“Sister’s honor,” I say, crossing my heart. I put my arm around her shoulder and shake my head. “Well…unless you tell Dad that I’m a registered Democrat, because we both know that information would get me written right out of the will.”

We share a laugh so deep that I can actually feel it healing us from the inside out.

There Will Be Blood

2010-09-03T11:24:00.000-04:00

My husband's car decided to have a tantrum yesterday (as cars so often do - especially cars that are almost paid off), so he took mine to work this morning.

So. I'm without a car today, on this FUN FRIDAY.

Okay, I realize that this is a First World problem (the kind of problem that only people who live in First World countries understand, i.e. broken air conditioning units, broken fake nails, broken computers...you get the idea). The rational part of my brain realizes that I shouldn't be complaining, that I'm sitting here in the air conditioning having just eaten an entire breakfast of eggs, bacon, and pancakes (because it's Fun Friday! I get bacon! Okay, who am I kidding, I eat bacon almost daily. I love bacon - sue me.) while I peruse the Internet while my child is distracted by Curious George.

I get it.

But the irrational side of my brain just registered that I DRANK MY LAST COKE LAST NIGHT. I reached into the box and came up with NOTHING. Do you have any idea what this means? I have no coke. NOOOOO COOOOOOKE. And no car. And a husband who won't be home until two in the morning.

Wait a minute, let me just check something...

I have wine! All is not lost!

Happy Weekend everyone. I will not be posting on Monday, so come back and see me on Wednesday!

I Have Enough Frenzy Already - I Don't Need Franzen

2010-09-01T14:50:00.001-04:00

This day has turned into one of those days. The kind where you wake up hopeful, peppy even, until your foot hits the ground (and comes into direct corner contact with another $%*# LEGO). Then it's a whoooole other ball game, kids. I had really good intentions to write a nice long post about all this Franzen hype, but alas, my motherly duties have taken over my day, not to mention my brain.

Unless you've been under a rock (or have been otherwise absorbed in MOCKINGJAY), you've heard about the whole Franzen/Picoult/Weiner/boys vs. girls/literary vs. commercial insanity. As a writer of women's fiction, I feel like I have a direct stake in how this whole argument plays out. I'm hoping that because of women like Picoult and Weiner, the New York Times takes a long, hard look at how biased they are and move to change it. I'm hoping, but I'm not betting on it.

What about you? Did you know about the drama? Do you think women are treated unfairly in the literary world, be they romance writers, chick-lit (or the more PC "shoe-lit") writers, or contemporary women's fiction writers?

*For the record, I will most likely read Franzen's FREEDOM, because I enjoy popular fiction.

Dads Are Funny, Too

2010-08-30T11:45:00.000-04:00

Hair and Legos

2010-08-27T15:25:00.001-04:00

Hundreds of years from now, when archaeologists are digging around looking for clues about our society, this is the contribution that my family will have made:

There was a dog; two children who ate hydrogenated oil-filled snacks and played with Legos; a mother who shed worse than aforementioned dog. Also note, tech geek husband probable due to video camera apparatus piece discovery - need further assessment.

So, I haven't properly swept or mopped my house since, hmm, I think Bush was still in office. I think it's time. YES, I CAN.

Happy Friday, people. If you don't hear from me next week, it's probably because I was swallowed whole by a giant dust bunny.

Love It/Hate It Kindergarten Style

2010-08-23T10:49:00.000-04:00

My son made it successfully through his first week of Kindergarten!!!

This further proves the fact that I really am quite the exemplary mother he really is the coolest kid on the planet. He did have one minor hiccup, the details of which I will not go into here on the Internet. Why? Because I don't want to get a call when he's, I don't know, middle aged and in therapy, telling me how he remembers the time when I embarrassed him on the Internet. And I'll have to be all, "Uh, which time was that again?" No. I don't need that on my conscience.

In lieu of this celebration, here are the things I love/hate about my child being in Kindergarten.

Love It:
- He wears uniforms! He might complain about not having the freedom to choose his own clothes down the road, but I never will. Uniforms are God's gifts to mothers like me, who have a hard enough time dressing themselves at 6 A.M., let alone their kids.

- That he has already made a ton of friends, and that he asks me on a daily basis if they can come over and play. A lot of them are girls, which has me practicing my stinkeye I think is adorable.

- That I get that one on one time with my youngest. There is a lot less screaming and fighting and a lot more laughter. He has such an awesome little personality, and I get to hang out with him all day and just marvel at the funny things he says and does. He's a lot like his Daddy.

Hate It:
- Holy Lord, the crafts have already started. I am not a crafty person. I don't scrapbook; I don't paint; I don't make my own jewelry or clothes. I am completely inept when it comes to gluing anything to anything else. Also, I HATE LEGOS, and I am convinced they are the bane of most mothers' existence. Sorry, it seemed relevant.

- The paperwork. In addition to not being crafty, I am not all that organized either. I know, it's a wonder my husband even married me. I have no idea how to stay on top of the sheer magnitude of paper that now comes home in my son's tote bag. I AM OPEN TO SUGGESTIONS!

- Missing him. I miss him so, so, SO MUCH.

Do you have something you LOVE/HATE about your child being in school (Kindergarten or otherwise)?

First Time for a Writer's Conference?

2010-08-18T12:44:00.004-04:00

Last week, I put out the distress signal, calling all writerly friends to share any advice they had for a first time conference goer. I'm shaking in my flip-flops, people. I'm sure as the conference (which is in October) gets closer that adrenaline will replace anxiety (fingers crossed) and that I will be a lot more confident! In the meantime, I did a little research, and I'm here to share the wealth.

I now present, TIPS FOR FIRST TIME CONFERENCE GOERS by YOU, the readers. I took the liberty of only including the advice parts of your comments, which were LOVELY, by the way. Look for highlights in bold!

Wendy Paine Miller said...

Only advice I have is prepare as much as possible and bring business cards, a one-sheet, your first chapter...think that's about it. And be yourself...they'll love you!!!

Jennifer Shirk said...

Wear comfy shoes. Dress in layers--in case it's cold or hot in the speaking rooms. Bring a bag that has a folder with note paper for notes, pens, and cough drops or candy in case your throat gets dry from talking and meeting people.

Kay Richardson said...
I went to a conference once. Had too much to drink and made a pass at a senior publisher. My advice would be to avoid doing similar.
Karen said...
Tips-Bring notebook, things to write notes and names, if you have business cards, bring those (they are handy when talking to editors, agents...), and meet as many people as you can. We (www.kindredheartwriters.com ) have several "evergreen" posts on attending conferences. You're gonna love it!!
Laura said...
So excited for you! Writers conferences were really the beginning for me. Check out this post: http://kindredheartwriters.com/2010/08/davis-bunn-and-writers-conferences.html It's got some great ideas. My suggestion? After you've packed everything on your list, stick some chocolate in your suitcase!

Diane J. said...

Advice? Smile. Attend any receptions (you meet quite a few people that way), if you have the chance to do a pitch do it (one of the workshops I'm attending this year is Pitch Party - how to deliver an in-person pitch, I'm planning on pitching next year at the bigger conference, so I'm thrilled I got in this class.) Don't bring too many books, you'll end up buying some while you're there and your bags will be heavy heading home.

Colleen, over at Fiction Flurry , had this to say in response to a comment I made on her post about Writers Conferences: "My best tip is number one...be prepared. If you are meeting with agents, look up their website and be aware of what they are looking for. Also, it doesn't hurt to practice your "elevator pitch". The more at ease you are with it, the better chance you have of selling it!"

Now, for a few things I found just poking around:

The Guide to Literary Agents blog has a WEALTH of information. Just go to the site , scroll down on the left and click on Writers' Conferences.
I found this article on Conference Etiquette and this list of 8 Things to Maximize Networking at Conferences at suite 101 .
Here's an article with writers conference advice from an editorial director at Random House Children's Books (which is relevant, even if you aren't writing children's books).

Feel free to add any new tips in the comments. Thanks to everyone who responded. I hope this was helpful to you!

*** Absolutely NO IDEA why this post got all out of format, but hope it helps anyway!***

Jeopardy - Mommy Monday Edition

2010-08-16T13:23:00.000-04:00

Player 1: I'll take Words That Make a Mother Burst into Tears for $200, Alex.

Alex: All right, for $200. Your child might say this his/her first day of Kindergarten.

Player 1: What is, "It's okay, Mommy, I don't need you to hold my hand."

Alex: That is correct!

Seriously. That's what my son said to me this morning on our way into his school for "Meet the Teacher". Break my heart, right? Go ahead, stomp all over it with your brand new school shoes. You don't want to hold my hand today? I get it, Big boy - you're excited. But hooooo buddy, if you don't think you're going to pay for that, just you wait. Wait until you bring home your first girlfriend - I have a picture of you in the tub with her name ALL OVER IT.

Take heart, mothers of new kindergartners - we can do this.

Does Not Play Well With Others

2010-08-13T16:31:00.000-04:00

My mother loves to whip this story out from time to time, you know, to embarrass me in social situations. I'm pretty sure she told it at my graduation party, my wedding shower, and my baby shower.

It goes something like this:

Bethy (that's me) and her friend Jessica (my friend since we were in diapers) were playing in the backyard at Jessica's house. Jessica had this tiny play kitchen that she would play in for hours, making all manner of make believe goodies. Well, on this particular day, Jessica was playing "Chef" in her kitchen, and because no other suckers friends were around, the role of "Sous Chef" fell to Bethy.

So Jessica starts doling out responsibilities, telling Bethy, "Stir that (imaginary) stew in that (imaginary) pot, don't let it burn!" Bethy paid no attention to her, because she didn't like being told what to do...by anyone. So Jessica starts to tell her again, "Stir the stew! Stir the stew! IT'S BURNING! YOU NEED TO -- " Bethy turns, holding up her chubby little hand and says, "There ain't no spoon, there ain't no stew, and I AIN'T stirring it."

Okay, so we've established I don't enjoy being told what to do. Fast forward, twenty-five years later: Husband comes home from work early, and brings lunch.

"Hey, thanks for bringing lunch home, babe," I say, kissing him on the cheek. "Um, where's my large drink?"

"We're sharing this one," he says, taking a big sip and then setting it on the table.

"But I specifically asked for you to bring me a drink."

"Yeah, but I thought we could share," he says nonchalantly.

I start to twitch a little. "Seriously? You didn't get me my own?" He's just joking. Yeah, this has to be just a cruel joke. I mean, he knows how much I love my Coke (and you can find out, too, just read here).

"Yeah, I'm serious. I only got us one," he says, tucking into his sandwich like it's no big deal.

I say nothing more, sitting down to eat because I'm in a hurry to get to a party. When I get up to leave, I pick up the Coke to take it with me.

"Are you seriously taking that with you?" he says, eyeing the drink in my hand.

"Yep, I am," I say, and walk out the door.

You'd have thought that my mother would've warned my future husband that I don't play well with others. Apparently, she didn't.

Hopefully, he's learned his lesson.

One Foot in Front of the Other

2010-08-11T09:00:00.001-04:00

Over the past few months, I've gained SO MUCH insight from reading into the world of writing and publishing thanks to many of you, dear readers/writers/agents/editors. I have learned so much from just being a part of this great big Blogosphere -- it has changed my life.

However.

I'm taking it to the next level...

...wait for it...

...I'M FINALLY GOING TO MY FIRST CONFERENCE! WOO-HOO!!!

Ahem.

My amazing husband surprised me yesterday and gave me the go ahead to book it, and for that he will be rewarded with...well, that's of a private nature and this is a family blog.

Anyhoo, if you're wondering, it's the South Carolina Annual Writers Conference in Myrtle Beach, SC.

I'm ready to meet people, face to face. People who are passionate about the same things I am. Who are confused about the same things I am. Oh, to brush up against other authors IN PERSON! To feel the frenzy in the room when, I don't know, Rachelle Gardner is standing there in the flesh. Or Suzie Townsend. Or Irene Goodman. Gah!!!

Hang on, I'm gonna be sick.

I'm freaking nervous. It's not until October, but still. Help me? Please?

Do you have tips for a first time conference goer?

I mean, I want to know everything. What do I wear? What is a MUST to bring? I'm definitely going to have queries, synopses and chapters on hand, but what else???

I'm going to do a post with your helpful tips, where you will be mentioned! By me! Does that sweeten it? No? Hmm, well maybe I could send you two tickets to that thing you love? Or diamonds (Thank you, Old Spice Guy, for that one)? Which reminds me, you totally need to check out agent Nathan Bransford's post yesterday about writing maladies...the guy is hilarious!)

So, any advice is greatly appreciated.

Now, if you see anyone on the news for breaking a hip while doing cartwheels, that'd be me.

I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up

2010-08-09T09:00:00.000-04:00

Do you remember the LifeCall commercial from the 80's? The one where the little, old lady has fallen in her bathroom and can't get up? I remember my brother and I rolling on the floor laughing (or ROFL, for my teen readers. What? I can't talk like the cool kids?) watching this commercial when we were kids - oh, and The Clapper, remember that one (yeah, that'll be stuck in your head all day!)?

What's my point, you ask?

I cleaned my ENTIRE house yesterday. I'm talking closets, corners, beneath bathroom sinks - THE WORKS. My mother would be so proud. I even redecorated a little, meaning I finally got the diaper changing table out of my 3 YEAR OLD'S bedroom. He'll thank me someday.

But today? Today, I can't get out of my bed. No, I'm serious. I CAN'T MOVE. Why are you laughing? This isn't a joke. I'm glad I keep my computer by my bed, otherwise you WOULD NEVER KNOW!

I don't believe in karma, but I know that somewhere in heaven that little old lady is pointing directly at me and (between fits of maniacal laughter) is saying, "Who's laughing now whippersnapper?"

You win, LifeCall lady. You win.

Who Doesn't Love a Good Contest?

2010-08-06T18:18:00.003-04:00

It's Fun Friday, kids. Today was spent having...FUN. My son starts Kindergarten in a week, so we're soaking up the last few bits of fun before he leaves me FOOOORREEEVVVVEEERRR. I'm not going to cry...I'm not.

Moving on...with happy thoughts! What makes me happy?

- Puppies

- Rainbows

- Bubble baths...

...and RONI AND JULIE'S TOTALLY EPIC SUMMER CONTEST! Seriously, if you're not following Roni over at Fiction Groupie and the equally wonderful Julie (who just sold her YA book Tempest and signed a three-book deal with Thomas Dunne Publishers!) at Diary of an Unpublished Wanna-be Writer then you are MISSING OUT. Not just because of the contest (they've been interviewing agents all week and it is some invaluable information), but because they are two very talented women.

SO writers, it would behoove you to get over there and take advantage of the amazing giveaways...query critiques! 5 page manuscript critiques! book giveaways!

Non-writers, Happy Friday. Um, yeah, that's all for you. Maybe I'll have something epic for you NEXT Friday.

What Are You Made Of?

2010-08-04T13:25:00.007-04:00

I'm no coin collector, but I've never seen a silver penny before, have you?

This is a 1943 penny. Wait. What? Aren't most pennies made of copper? Yes, most are. However, 1943 pennies (also known as a silver pennies, because they look as though they're made from silver, as seen in the picture above) were made of steel, because the U.S. was elbow deep into World War II and copper supplies were scarce. What's interesting, is that silver pennies are actually more common than these 1943 copper pennies, seen here:

These particular copper pennies are rare. They're collector's items.

As a writer, I want to be a 1943 copper penny. Of course I want to be a rare treasure amongst all the other common pennies out there. But the depth of it? Copper is more malleable than steel - hot or cold, it has a greater ability to be bent and shaped without cracking. It's unique because of what it's made of.

I want to bend easily - to be capable of being shaped without cracking. I don't think I'm there yet, but hopefully someday.

Bumper Cars!

2010-08-02T15:17:00.004-04:00

Friday night, I had the divine pleasure of having a night out with some of my girlfriends. We went to an awesome Mexican restaurant and stuffed ourselves with soft tacos before heading out to see a movie. We decided to see Charlie St. Cloud, even though my better judgement told me that I really shouldn't see it. It really was a GREAT movie (despite it being SO SAD!) and I was pleasantly surprised by Zac Efron's performance.

In case you haven't watched the trailer or haven't seen the movie and are planning to, do not read any further!

***SPOILER ALERT***

There's a car crash, and the little boy dies. Yeah, after my weepy, emotional week last week, I saw a movie where the little boy dies. Ugh.

Flash forward to Saturday morning. The hubby and I decide to take the boys out and get some breakfast and maybe pick up some new Legos (my oldest is OBSESSED). We had just pulled out of the shopping center, stifled in our search (the place where we stopped didn't have them), and were stopped at a red light. Our light turns green, we start to turn. My husband slams on his breaks, and INSSLLLLOOOOWWWWMOOOTTTTIOOON, this girl in a pick up truck slams into us.

PRAISE GOD, NO ONE WAS HURT.

She saw us in time to slam on her breaks, and gratefully, my husband had the presence of mind to turn the wheel toward her so that the brunt of the impact hit our front left tire and bumper*. The boys immediately started crying, so I took them into the Burger King (whose parking lot we pulled into after the accident) to try and calm them down. How do you explain a car accident to a five year old? "Oh, well...erm, remember the other day when we were doing bumper cars at the amusement park? That's kind of what happened, mkay?" He sniffed, and then skipped off to play in the playground. Crisis averted...again.

After the police report was taken and we had all settled down a bit, my husband turned to me over his french fries and said (while giggling to himself), "Do you know that you were speaking in tongues right after she hit us?" And I was all, "No, I didn't, but even if I did, who cares? I was in shock." To which, he said, "Yeah, you totally did." And I was all, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT MOVIE I SAW LAST NIGHT!?"

*Our truck is not driveable, but thank the Lord for insurance!

This is Why I Love the Internet

2010-07-30T10:17:00.007-04:00

*Photos courtesy of Google Images. Canterbury Cathedral in England. This is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen in in person. The photo doesn't even do it justice!

Wondering why I chose those pics? Watch the video and you'll see :)

After yesterday's post, I was so grateful to read all of your encouraging and empathetic comments about how I was feeling. The more I thought on it, I realized that it's not just the writing life that causes me to feel insignificant at times. I feel it every once in a while about my parenting, my faith, my inability to do anything significant about things that seem so out of control (think natural disasters or child slavery). I think Wendy and Heather's comments really hit it on the head for me, so thanks girls!

And then, as I was attempting to pass on some of my newfound awareness and encouragement to a new blogger (check her out, Brooke at Bring About Art), I remembered something PROFOUND that I had the opportunity to see at a Women of Faith conference a few years back. Nicole Johnson does a skit called The Invisible Woman.

I AM IN LOVE with this skit. I don't know why my brain couldn't recall this when I was feeling all melodramatic yesterday! If you have a few minutes, please go and watch it. If you've seen it before, WATCH IT AGAIN. I guarantee it will bless you again and again.

You are not invisible. You are not insignificant. You are TREASURED and you are LOVED by the God of the universe.

*I apologize to my male audience (all two of you ;P) for going all hormonal on you (but for the record, you are treasured and loved by God, too.). So to make up for it, watch this and tell me you didn't laugh.

OOPSIE!

2010-07-29T12:36:00.003-04:00

SOMEONE forgot that yesterday was Wednesday, so SOMEONE didn't post their regularly scheduled material. Something that SOMEONE never forgets. Oh, wait, yes...SOMEONE DOES.

So I totally let Wednesday slip by me. My apologies. It's probably because I didn't really have any ideas rolling around for my usual Writer Wednesday post, you know, the ones where I WOW you with all of my helpful writing information, like in this post and this one here. Wait, what? What do you mean they only prove that I'm not good at sticking with a schedule? Whatevs.

All I really have to say on this Writer Thursday (Yeah, I renamed it today. BECAUSE I CAN, that's why.) is that sometimes when reading around the writer's blogosphere (you know the one that holds all the other writers and agents and editors, oh my), I start to feel really small. Like how you feel when you stare up at the stars in the massive expanse of sky at night. Will I ever be noticed? Can people see me? Do I matter?

Just my melancholy thoughts for today. Maybe I need to stop listening to my Tori Amos station on Pandora. By the way, have you heard of Pandora? I always have it on when I'm writing and need inspiration. You just type in your fave artist or song, and it plays similar music for you. See? I have good stuff here people!!!

Do you ever feel, I don't know, insignificant?

Dusk and Summer

2010-07-26T11:24:00.007-04:00

Our family has had a wonderful summer, and I'm sad that the end is quickly approaching. Mostly, because my oldest will be starting Kindergarten in a few short weeks...sniff. Also, because we've had A LOT of fun as a family. In an effort to hold on to the last few shreds of the good times, I thought today's post could be a summary in pictures. Enjoy!

Fun at Disney World with Mickey and Minnie!

This is my adorable cousin, David, and his equally adorable new wife, Julie.

Me, my sweet cousins Sarah, Stephanie, and Susi, my amazing Aunt Helen and my wonderful Mom, at cousin David's wedding in California. I'm lucky to be alive people.

This is a beautiful home in Turtletown (yes, Turtletown - the closest nearby town? DUCKTOWN...heehee), Tennessee, that we were fortunate to be able to stay in for a week! My husband took this picture, and I swear it could be a postcard!

My sweet baby boys caught a ton of fish!

Mommy might have caught a couple too, though this picture does not give proper representation to the HUGE fish I caught...or my fashion sense.

This was a hilarious photo I took at an awesome orchard in Blue Ridge, Georgia, on our way to Tennessee. This is how we roll in Georgia.

Last, but not least, one of my FAVORITE pictures from this summer. This is probably the closest that they managed to be to one another THE ENTIRE SUMMER without doing bodily harm. Man, I'm going to miss this...sniff.

What's Creepier than Creepy?

2010-07-23T10:54:00.001-04:00

Did you ever play that game in school? What's Grosser than Gross? Welcome to What's Creepier than Creepy?

So the hubs and I have been kicking around the idea of expanding our family for a while now. Truth be told, our youngest son (we have two, 5 and 3) has been giving us a run for our money, so the idea of a third child has pretty much been kicked out the door as of late.

However, 'tis still a possibility...someday.

Should I have another child (or children, since I have the ever terrifying, yet realistic possibility of twins in my family), you can rest assured that I will NOT be registering for a set of these:

What's missing in this picture? Oh, that's right: ARMS. Yep, those are DISEMBODIED hands that snuggle your child, so that they can sleep.

Except, in my sick and twisted mind, they're hands that ARE NOT MY OWN just waiting for me to leave the room so that they can STRANGLE MY BABY. Okay, maybe I watched too many episodes of The Addams Family growing up, but seriously? There's a market for these creepy things?

Happy Friday. I'm off to throw away every pair of gloves in my house.

Who's Your Muse?

2010-07-21T11:12:00.003-04:00

With the rhyming of that title one would maybe assume that Dr. Seuss is mine?

For the record, he's not. But I do have them.

Plenty of people have muses. They can be a person (or several), a place, even a band - anything that serves as inspiration.

Author Stephenie Meyer (of the Twilight books, in case you've been under a rock for the last 3 years) has said that the band Muse is her, well, muse. I seem to share the band-as-muse gene with Ms. Meyer. I'm sure by now you know that I love U2 (more specifically, BONO). No? You didn't know? Read this. Now you know! U2 gets my creative juices flowing and they are always in my playlist when I'm writing.

I also consider Savannah, Georgia one of my muses. The first time I visited I fell in love with it. Each time I'm there (three times so far) I feel more inspired to write. I hope to have a home there one day (or if all else fails maybe I'll rent one of those air-conditioned storage units and put a pull out couch in it).

I also have a few real-life muses. My mother is one of them. The others are celebrities and are too embarassing to admit to the entire Internet, so I'll keep them my little secret.

Your turn: Who's your muse?

What a Character

2010-07-14T09:00:00.001-04:00

I don't know about you, but strangers LOVE to talk to me: in the grocery store, in line at the movies, on an airplane when I have a laptop in front of me. Sometimes I think I have a sign on my forehead that says, "TALK TO ME...FOR HOURS...BECAUSE I'LL LISTEN." Would I like to hear about your recent colonoscopy? You betcha! Oh, man, you're getting a divorce? Sure! Tell me all about how ugly it's going to be TOTAL STRANGER!

I really should travel with a pop up leather couch and start charging by the hour.

I think, however, that I may have pinpointed why total strangers like to share their life stories with me:

I smile. I'm a smiler. Yep, that's me.

Actually, most of the time I'm happy to talk with people and hear about where they've come from, where they've been - especially the elderly. Oh man, I could listen to their stories for hours (if only they could stay awake that long!). The only time I get a little cranky with chatty people is if I'm in a big hurry to get somewhere (which is rare) or have a cranky child on my hands (which is NOT so rare).

I love to listen.

This works to my benefit where my writing is concerned. I put away these stories in my mental filing cabinet and pull them out when I need a little something extra for a character. In fact, one of the supporting characters in my book is based on a woman I met in line for an amusement park ride.

In the busy, day-to-day goings on, it's really easy to tune people out. But if you're a writer, maybe the next time a total stranger strikes up a conversation, you should tune in! You never know what you might hear...like the time a lady told me that she had "accidentally" shot her husband (he lived, although I'm not sure she was happy with that outcome!).

What about you? Are you a listener? Do you use what you hear in your stories?

Holy White Knuckled Driving Batman!

2010-07-12T14:25:00.003-04:00

Did you miss me? I missed you.

So I just returned from a (rather long, surprisingly disconnected from technology) vacation. That's one of the joys of having a teacher for a spouse...summer break! We did some time (not of the jail variety...although I could've been arrested for driving too slowly on the Freeway in California, as you'll see below) in South Florida with our respective families and had a great time. The beaches were unmarred by oil (thank the Lord!), and we got appropriately sunburned. Then my sweet mom and I got to escape sans husbands/kids/grandkids to Los Angeles for my cousin's wedding.

Well.

Let me just say, I don't know how people live in LA. I really don't. Yeah, I get the whole "sunshine and cool breezes all the time" thing. But that is NOT what we experienced while we were out there. Of course it wasn't, because we had packed for JUST THAT KIND OF DREAMY CALIFORNIA WEATHER. But no...NO! We land and walk into dreary, hazy, cold weather. Wait a second...I thought the destination on our tickets said Los Angeles...not Seattle (although I really do love Seattle for a visit. I couldn't live there, the weather is too depressing for this already medicated mommy). What's going on here?

Okay, so the weather stinks, but we're happy because it's still just the two of us. Just me and Mom...no one else to feed, take to the bathroom, or look after but ourselves. BLISS! So we go get our suitcase (the one we had to pay extra for because we got, as my Dad puts it, "took" at the curbside check-in in Atlanta...which was such a delightful beginning to the trip), and make our way over to the rental car place to get our car. We had anticipated a really LONG line, and to our delight, there's not a soul in the place. We get our car (a mack daddy Crown Victoria BOAT of a car, since our Dodge Charger was unavailable), and really, this is where my belief in providence comes into play. We take one look at the car and laugh, because we are going to be driving this monstrosity all over chic, sporty sports car LA.

Well...again.

I have never been so thankful to have such a large vehicle IN MY LIFE. I thought Atlanta traffic was bad? Hooo buddy, was I dead wrong. Almost literally DEAD wrong. LA traffic is...really there are no words for it. Let's just say, if Ozzy Osbourne and Axl Rose had a love child, they would name it I-405.

People drive fast in Atlanta, but for the most part I'd have to say they're safe drivers. In LA? LA people drive fast AND crazy. They're in and out of lanes, texting, talking, all but sleeping while driving (although some drivers appeared to be doing even that). So. The Crown Vic? LOVE THAT BIG OL' CAR. I might just get one when I'm...I don't know, 80?

The wedding was beautiful and we had a fantastic time with my aunt and the rest of my cousins that we rarely get to see. I even got to see my cousin's new baby girl, who could possibly be one of the funniest and best babies I've ever met in my life. Our flight back to Atlanta went off without a hitch, and I smiled as we drove back to my house in traffic that didn't make me want to swerve off of the road and breathe into a paper bag for...THE REST OF MY LIFE!

There's a reason LA is the City of Angels. I'm just sayin'...

Show Some Blog Love - Results!!!

2010-06-20T15:17:00.006-04:00

I promised I would be posting the results from last week's Show Some Blog Love post today, and (even though I spent the better part of the day trying to find an out of state doctor and then fill the stupid prescription that doctor prescribed me) HERE IT IS! By the skin of my teeth...unless you live on the West Coast...it's only 8pm there! :)

Okay...drumroll please!

First, here's who responded:

Tamika at The Write Worship

Diane (who by far had the most suggestions! Awesome Diane!) at Contentedly Neurotic

J.M. at Ducks Out of a Row

Sara at EatWell.LoveMuch.LaughOften

Laura at Outnumbered Mom

Wendy at All In A Day's Thought

And now...drumroll please...here are the blogs you can't live without! Separated into helpful categories by yours truly :)

Helpful Blogs for Writers

Forgotten Bookmarks

BookEnds LLC - A Literary Agency

Booking It

Editorial Anonymous

Evil Editor

Janet Reid - Literary Agent

Nathan Bransford - Literary Agent

Rachelle Gardener - Literary Agent

No Disclaimers Beta Service

Query Shark

Blogs by Writers Sharing their Journies

Plot Whisperer for Writers

The Road to Publication

The WM Freelance Writer's Connection

The Writing Mama

Thoughts, Writing, and Coffee

Unedited

Missed Periods and Other Grammar Scares

Spiritual Inspiration

Building His Body

How-To/Advice (Cooking, Photography, Etc.)

The Pioneer Woman

Helpful for Moms

Bina's Pad

Boy Crazy

Coming Clean: Confessions of an Imperfect Parent

Good for a Laugh

PHEW! So, there they are. I hope that you find a new blog to love!

Sorry Gang

2010-06-18T16:43:00.003-04:00

The "Show Some Blog Love" results post was supposed to be today.

And then I woke up feeling like a big pile of...well, you can use your imagination. Could be too much sun. Could be not enough sleep. Could be a lot of things, but the outcome is still the same. Icky feeling! Definitely not in shape to be staring at a computer screen for more than five minutes.

I will post the results on Monday instead. I promise, there are some great blog suggestions in store for you!

SO COME BACK ON MONDAY AND SEE ALL THE GREAT BLOGS FOR YOURSELF!

I'm off to find some ginger ale. And a soft spot to lay down.

Thank You Kill Zone for Reading My Mind

2010-06-16T13:53:00.005-04:00

I was going to write a post today about how my internal editor is KILLING ME. Every time I sit down to start writing, I try to refresh myself by reading what I'd written in my previous writing session.

Then it starts.

Oh, that doesn't flow very well. Let's just fix that. Hmm, that doesn't really make sense right there, I'll just move it back a few pages. Oh, wait, where was I again? Oh, crap. I already said that a few sentences back, better cut that...

And on and on it goes, until I've wasted that very small chunk of time (when my kids are sleeping or not trying to kill each other) that I had planned to use writing.

Enter Kill Zone, where author Joe Moore has given us a post entitled "It's Perfect. Now Make It Perfecter." on the ill-effects of perfectionism. I mean, his post title alone sent me into full body convulsions. MUST FIX "PERFECTER". GAHHH!

Joe says, "First, you must convince yourself that NOTHING is perfect, especially when it comes to writing fiction. Now I’m not talking about spelling, punctuation, grammar and syntax. Those are the rules of writing just like the speed limit and stop lights are the rules of the road. But those rules have NOTHING to do with perfection, only correctness. Perfection is a mental concept. It can never be achieved. There will always be room for improvement.

Next, you must allow yourself to write less-than-perfect prose the first time with the understanding that it's more important to tell the story."

I should have this quote tattooed on my body somewhere, because it would be helpful to be reminded of this advice EVERY SINGLE DAY.

What about you? Are you beaten down by your perfectionism?

Thanks, Joe. I needed this today :)

Love It/Hate It - Limited Release Florida Edition

2010-06-14T13:00:00.010-04:00

So we made it to Florida after a 12 hour drive and minimal outbursts from the kids! Woo Hoo! It has been lovely so far. Here's a few things I'm loving at the moment:

Love It:

1. Sunshine and blue skies during the day, making the beach a heavenly place to be. Also, my boys look like Coppertone kids, and it's so stinking cute.

2. Rain showers in the afternoon making for delightful naptimes.

3. A pool mere steps from my parents' condo.

4. Family!!! (a.k.a. FREE BABYSITTING!!!) Also, I have the best.family.ever. and I love them to pieces.

5. Tomorrow I celebrate 8 years of marriage with my amazing husband and best friend. I love you babe!

Hate It:

1. Seaweed. Why is this stuff necessary again?

2. When those rain showers turn into thunderstorms...not so delightful.

3. My hair in Florida weather = frizzy all the time.

4. My own tan lines...grrr. However, better to have tan lines then no tan at all, am I right?

Hope everyone is enjoying their summer so far! Don't forget, there's still time to let me know what your favorite blog is! Tune in Friday to see the suggestions. You never know, you might find a new blog you can't live without! :)

*Photos courtesy of Google Images

Show Some Blog Love

2010-06-11T10:35:00.002-04:00

Do you have a favorite blog? Or several favorites that you follow? Are they inspirational? Are they funny? Do they ask questions that get you thinking? Well here's your chance to tell everyone WHO YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT! (Okay, maybe that's a stretch - but who do you reallyreallyreally like to read?)

Next Friday, I will link to all of the blogs you mentioned, as well as to your own!

So show some blog love...and leave a comment with your favorite blog(s)!

On Tooting Your Own Horn

2010-06-08T22:26:00.004-04:00

In a recent post about how to use social media more effectively, blog friend Jody Hedlund said, "Cyberland is not the place to continuously brag about our awesome accomplishments and our five-star book reviews."

And I completely agree - as I often do - with Jody's assesment...

EXCEPT FOR TODAY!

No, no, dear readers. Today I'm bragging. Shameless, Blatant, Narcissistic BRAGGING.

Why? Why all this nonsense?

I'll tell you.

I got an HONORABLE MENTION in agent Rachelle Gardner's One Sentence Summary Contest. I almost peed a little when I saw it.

In all honesty, I'm incredibly grateful. I know it's not a HUGE deal (I mean, it's not like I actually WON the contest, my name wasn't even included next to my pitch) but it was good enough to be mentioned by Rachelle, and for me, little novice writer, that is BIG.

It's big for me, because this writing game can be so nerve-wracking, overwhelming, and discouraging. This little blip, this flash of MY words on HER blog, was just the shot in the arm that I needed to get this book finished. Because maybe, JUST MAYBE, someone will actually want to read it...

Seriously, Rachelle, you've made this writer's YEAR. :)

What about you? Have you gotten a shot in the arm lately? Or could you use one?

This Mommy's Catching Some Rays

2010-06-07T15:19:00.003-04:00

We're taking a little vacation to Florida a week from now, and this mommy needed to get some sun. BADLY.

I'm a native Floridian that has been transplanted to Georgia (which makes me sound like I don't have a husband and kids, but I DO!), so it is completely unacceptable to vacation down in my home state without the proper base tan. I do NOT want to look like a tourist (and yes, I can be incredibly vain at times).

Although, with the way this (horrific, catastrophic, idiotic) oil spill is shaping up, I may get brown just from taking a quick dip in the ocean. :(

So, I've been spending all of my free time with the kiddos soaking up some sunshine at our community pool, which has been GLORIOUS.

I'm a much happier person when the sun is out, are you?

RIP Hard Drive

2010-06-02T15:31:00.006-04:00

My husband took my (sad little) broken laptop to the repair place to see how bad the damage was from its epic fall from the mantle of our fireplace.

Bad news is: my hard drive is a goner. Thank the Good Lord I had recently emailed my full manuscript to myself, because I still have that. However, all the notes, cuts, rough outlines, and character sketches that I had (idiotically) not backed up are gone :(

Good news is: I'll have a spankin' new hard drive, which means lots of free memory space!

Being without my laptop these last few weeks has felt like losing one of my limbs. I know there are diehard people out there who can write anywhere at anytime, but I am not one of them. I do NOT write well while I'm at home - thus the laptop.

There are two reasons for this: 1) My sons are crazy 2) My house is in constant need of attention because my sons are crazy. Having two (adorable, smart, energetic) boys means constant interruptions which, for this writer, means complete loss of concentration. I can usually only write (at least write WELL) when my kids are deep in sleep. And that's only if I lock myself in our office (or at my desk in my bedroom, which I think I need to MOVE because of its proximity to my BED). If I don't lock myself away in a room, then I will be too tempted to turn on the television or fold the ever haunting pile of laundry or clean something.

My places of choice to write are Barnes & Noble, where I can be surrounded by books (I find that very inspiring) or Starbucks, where I'm bombarded with the aroma of coffee (I find that very de-tiring...is that a word? I just made that up because it rhymed.) However, with no laptop I have been forced to write at home. Can't wait to edit THOSE chapters.

All that to say, I'm very excited to get my laptop back...I've missed her very much (Of course she's a SHE!).

A Quote and a Contest

2010-05-27T23:29:00.008-04:00

Son of a motherless goat!

That's my new favorite expression...and I can't even remember where I heard it. I know it was in a movie, but I can't think of which one. Anyhoo, that's what I said this morning at about 3am when my son threw up in my bed. Poor little guy had a pretty high fever, so I took him to the doctor this morning and they think he has a virus.

Little boy with a virus = I don't get to go see hubby's baseball team play for the state championship today :( Thankfully, my friend Jodi will be at the game and will be texting me the score - GO WOLVES!

On a side note: In honor of gaining 500 followers (ahh, a girl can dream) Megan Rebekah is doing a contest over on her blog. You could win a nifty book OR a full MS critique...so go check it out! Oh, and if you win and don't care to take the prize, you can totally pass it on to me. I mean, don't let my sick child make you feel bad for me or anything. It's not like I could really USE a pick me up. I'll just be here...cleaning up vomit. Is the guilt working yet? hee hee :P

That's all I've got for you beautiful people on this lovely Friday. Hope everyone has a fantastic Memorial Day weekend - REMEMBER OUR VETERANS AND OUR TROOPS!